Page 29 of Losing the Forbidden
“Seriously, how did Liv get those tickets?” I ask Liam.
“I think someone was selling them on or something. Cost us all a damn fortune.”
Guilt twists my stomach that they’re all out of pocket trying to cheer me up. “I can pay for them all.”
“Don’t be stupid. This is on us,” Dec argues as we hear footsteps and giggling descending the stairs.
“I think I’ve changed my mind about going out,” Liam announces the second Liv walks into the room wearing a little black dress.
He immediately sweeps her into his arms, followed by Dec who does the same to Nic. I once again feel like the gooseberry of the group. Awkwardly, I manage to squeeze past them and walk out to the driveway with my head down.
Mum’s words from yesterday ring in my ears. Is it too late? Is what she said true? Are we over? Has she really moved on?
Once they’ve finished manhandling each other, they join me and we head towards the tube station to take us into the city centre. Liam and Dec are oblivious, but I get sympathetic smiles from the girls. They seem to have a better understanding of how painful it is seeing them all loved up and happy.
Nicole and Liv choose a popular gastro pub for dinner before heading towards the O2.
As we stand outside waiting in line, I’m more grateful than I think I’ve ever been for a distraction. The prospect of spending an hour or two watching Rita up on stage is enough for me to push everything with Mum, Lauren, Erica, and the business to the back of my mind. I know as soon as tonight’s over that I’ll have to deal with them all once again, but for now, I’m just going to enjoy myself.
The seats are fucking incredible for last minute, second-hand tickets.
“You’re something else, you know that?” I shout to Liv as the support act takes to the stage. “You’ve no idea how badly I need this.”
“I think I do.” She winks at me, and I’m reminded of everything she went through recently and how she knows better than anyone what a good distraction from reality can do.
Wrapping my arm around her shoulder, I kiss the top of her head. Liam smiles at me from next to her and I nod back. These guys have been my family for the past six years, and they mean more to me than I think they’ll ever understand. They were exactly what I needed in those first few months after leaving London, and the fact that they’re here now when I need them is everything to me.
Feeling a little choked up, I’m glad when the band leave the stage and the crowd erupts in excitement for the lady of the night.
Butterflies explode in my stomach as the anticipation builds. The only thing that would make tonight better would be if Lauren were here to experience it with me. I look to my left, at the random lady patiently staring at the stage, and my excitement wanes.
I missed her so fucking much when I was in Devon, but being here, with her practically in touching distance, is even worse.
The concert is more than I ever thought it might be. I’ve wanted to see her live ever since I first heard her voice on the radio a few years ago. My desire only got worse when I Googled her and discovered she looked as good as she sounded. I’ve taken plenty of stick over the years about my obsession, but I couldn’t give a fuck. She’s hot and her music is sweet, so what’s not to love?
The whole time she’s singing, I completely forget about all the bullshit surrounding me, all the unknowns about my life. I embrace every second of the freedom she provides me with. I breathe that little bit easier with her voice filling my ears.
“So?” Liv asks as we walk from the arena once the show is over. “Was it everything you always dreamed of?” I don’t miss the little smirk on her lips.
“It was incredible. Thank you so much.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Please tell me we’re not heading home yet.” I’m buzzing after that and really not ready to deal with reality.
“No, we’re heading to a club.”
Liv takes the lead and we follow her down to the tube station and further into the city.
The second we emerge from the underground, I know exactly where we’re going. I remember the little chat she had with Erica yesterday, and I realise they were planning this night. Erica never wanted to go anywhere but Fire back in the day.
As we approach the club I used to know so well, I notice some obvious changes. The orange Fire signage is long gone, replaced with a more upmarket look. It’s now called The Avenue, and everything’s black and chrome. From the few people outside, it no longer looks to be filled with drunk students and has a slightly higher quality clientele, something I’m relieved about.
“This place looks nice,” Nicole says from behind me as we queue up to get in.
They chat away, but I don’t hear most of it. The anticipation that’s running through me is the only thing I can focus on. If Erica had something to do with these plans, then there’s a very good chance she’s here…and Lauren could be too.
My heart thunders in my chest as the bouncer gestures for us to enter. I immediately take the stairs up to the second floor. I’ve no idea if it would still be Erica’s choice, but it’s the only thing I have to go on if we’re going to find her.
