Page 34 of Fighting for the Forbidden
Chapter Nine
Ben
“Fuuuuck,”I groan as the pain radiating from my ribs renders the rest of my body useless. In my need to get to her, I misjudge the width of the mattress and end up on the fucking tiled floor. My ribs scream in pain and my arm aches where I landed on the fucking cast.
“Lauren,” I shout once again, but I know it’s already too late. She’s gone. Gone fuck only knows where in a foreign fucking city.
It takes me longer than I want to admit to get up off the floor, but I eventually manage to drag my aching, tense body back out to the balcony to find my phone. When I unlock it, the photo of Joe hovering over another man’s lips lights up on my phone, and another wave of anger washes through me. She was fucking lying to me this whole time. Part of me knew something wasn’t right. The warning signs have been there the whole time. He knew we’d slept together yet he didn’t lay a finger on me. If someone else so much as looks at her the wrong way when she’s mine, I’ll break their fucking nose, so the fact he hardly even flinched should have been evidence enough. But the image of them both standing in their doorway looking all loved up when she sent me away still haunts me. They were so convincing. My fist clenches with my need to do something, to break something…or someone. I knew I should have fucking hit him on that scaffolding.
Finding Lauren’s number, I lift my phone to my ear. It takes forever to connect, but when it does, it goes straight to voicemail.
“Fucking hell.” Throwing it down on the table, I rest my head back and squeeze my eyes shut. My entire body is strung tight, desperate for the release that was so fucking close. My cock twitches at the memory of being inside of her and how tight she squeezed me as she got herself off. Lifting my head, I gaze down at my useless right arm. I might be right on the edge, but I already know that my left hand won’t cut it.
I knew she was angry. Her eyes had pure hatred oozing from them as she climbed on top of me, but I’d no idea she was planning on leaving me high and dry.
Over the next few hours, I continue trying her phone, but at no point does it even ring. I’ve just about lost my fucking mind by the time I hear the click of the key card in the lock later that evening—hours after she walked out.
Moving as quickly as I can, I’m in the doorway when she comes into view. It takes her a few seconds to lift her eyes from the floor, but when she does, all I see is hurt.
“Fuck.” Pushing my own pain aside, I walk up to her and pull her into me. The second she’s in my arms, her body trembles and her cries take over. A lump forms in my throat and my eyes sting as my own tears threaten.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper into her hair as the reality of how much we’re hurting each other hits me. “I’m so sorry.”
We cling onto each other for the longest time, but eventually her breathing evens out and her trembling subsides. She pulls back to look at me, her blue eyes swimming behind unshed tears.
“Where the hell have you been?” It comes out harsher than I intended, and her body stiffens before she forces herself from my arms.
“Where have I been?” she repeats, as if it’s the most insane question she’s ever been asked. “How fucking dare you.” My eyes widen, taken back by her sudden anger. “I was gone for a few hours, and you were worried sick. How the fuck did you think I felt when you left for six fucking years, Ben?”
“I—” I swallow the emotion bubbling up my throat. She’s right.
She blows out a long breath and I see her fight leave her. Her eyes drop from mine to where I’m holding my ribs. “Are you okay after…”
“After you fucked me half to death? Yeah, I’m good.”
Her cheeks blush and she looks away. “Liar.” She gives me a weak smile and I can’t really argue because my ribs hurt like a motherfucker. “I picked you up some more painkillers. Here.” She hands me a bag and heads out to the balcony. “We need to talk,” she says, sensing me behind her. She’s resting her palms on the railings, looking out at the ancient city in the distance. “We need to talk without shouting or fucking. We need to find a way to move past this…bullshit. I’m exhausted, Ben, and you’ve only been back a few days. We can’t keep rehashing the same shit over and over.”
“Here.” At the sound of my voice, she turns and takes the bottle of water in my outstretched hand.
“Thank you.” Our fingers touch as she takes it, and our eyes connect. There’s no denying that the connection we had all those years ago is still there. If anything, it’s stronger now. I know what I want to do about it; I’ve just no idea if Lauren’s willing to give me the second chance I want. I know it’s what she wants. I can see it in her eyes every time she looks at me. The question is, will she allow herself to go there again?
She watches as I carefully lower myself to the chair I’ve been sitting in, waiting for her to return. I wince in pain and she flinches like she can feel it too.
“We shouldn’t have done that earlier. You need to be resting, healing.”
“I’ll never say no to you, Lauren. You should know that by now.”
“Enough,” she snaps, and my eyes fly to hers. “We’re not doing this. We’re just talking.”
“You were the one who brought it up,” I sulk, a smile playing at my lips. Thankfully, she takes it the way I intended and her lips twitch too.
“Ben…I—” She twists her hands in front of her.
“Hey, it’s okay. Whatever it is, you can tell me.” Taking her hand in mine, I squeeze gently, hoping to give her the strength she needs to talk.
“It’s not that. It’s just…revisiting that time is painful.”
“I know, baby. I’m so, so—”
