Page 51 of The Destruction You Desire
I shake my head, my brain trying to reject the knowledge that my sister's life has been reduced to this.
I run my gaze up her arms. They're bruised, covered in scratches and cuts but the needle marks are obvious.
Dropping my head to my arm, I try to imagine what her life must have been like since she walked away from her baby, trying to understand how she must have felt to even be able to do that in the first place.
The thought of leaving Kayden damn near rips my heart out, and I'm only his aunt. How desperate for an escape from her own life, her reality, must she have been?
"We can fix this, Libby. We can. Me and you and your gorgeous boy. We can be a family again."
I don't hear Luca when he finally steps back into the room, I'm too exhausted both mentally and physically to know what's going on around me.
I startle when he places his hand on my shoulder.
"Everything is sorted."
Slowly, I turn to look up at him. My breath catching and my heart pounding in my chest as I stare at the man I hoped I'd find when I returned. The man before me is an older version of the boy I remember. He's sweet, thoughtful, caring. He just wants to take me in his arms and do all he can to make everything better.
And while I really appreciate that he still exists. That under all the hatred and anger he's still there. I'm not sure if I'm ever going to be able to forgive the other version of him that I've been acquainted with over the past few weeks.
His vicious words. They cut deep. Deeper than I think I even realized at the time. I'm not sure how I'm meant to be able to put them behind me.
Maybe I'm not meant to. Maybe it's a sign that all of this, us, it's all in the past.
"What's wrong, P? Has something happened?" he asks, concern laced through his voice.
I shake my head.
"N-no nothing's happened."
"Okay, good. I think."
Reaching out, he pulls a chair over and lowers himself down beside me, reaching over for my hand that's not holding Libby's.
He lifts it to his lips, pressing a long kiss to my knuckles that sends heat racing through my arm.
"We'll do everything we can to help her, P. I promise."
I blow out a shaky breath. "If only that would be enough."
I might not have any experience with junkies or any of this. But I know enough to know that when—if—she wakes up, she's going to need to want the help Luca is promising she can have or it's all for nothing. She'll disappear again and the next time I see her will probably be the last.
Sensing that I'm losing control of my emotions, Luca lifts me out of my chair as if I weigh nothing more than a feather and places me onto his lap.
If I weren't so exhausted, I might fight him on it, but right now, having his warmth and scent surrounding me feels too good. So I shut down everything to do with us from my brain and just take what I need in this moment.
Right now is about Libby. She has to be my focus.
All this shit with Luca can wait. There's plenty of time to try to get my head around how I really feel about all of that later.
"Thank you for being here. I appreciate what you're giving up to support us," I whisper into his chest, needing him to know that I'm not taking this for granted.
"Baby, there's nothing I wouldn't give up to be here with you right now."
I nod, swallowing down the messy ball of emotion that only seems to grow larger in my throat.
13
Luca
