Page 20 of Naughty Irish Fate
Chapter Seven
Bronwyn
Morning after's might be embarrassing or painful for some people.
Maybe even for me once.
But this morning after? It’s soft and hazy as I wake with a smile and aches in places I earned it. I know I won’t find Rooker here but I’m actually better knowing the truth. Thankful Rooker never once promised me something we both knew better than to believe.
Lingering in the bed that still smells of his clean and sexy scent, I go over every moment of last night. I know it was just last night, but I feel like it meant something more than simple sex to both of us. Even if I never see Rooker again, last night I owned pieces of him. And, truth is, he will always own pieces of me, too.
After showering and dressing in a hunter green sweater dress and knee-high boots, I head out for a while. It’s breezy and cool out but the sun is shining and I am all smiles. How could I not be?
“Morning Bronwyn.” Locking the pub doors behind me, I twist at the soft hello. Bryan.
“Morning Bryan. What’s going on?” Bryan owns a shop on Main Street too, passed on to him from his family just like me. Specializing in boats and netting, he’s as much a part of the fishing season as the crews that come and go from Shore Ridge.
Bryan has been around my entire life. Until a few years ago, I thought he was interested in being around the rest of it. While he is handsome and good, nothing ever sparked between us despite his flirtations. Until last night, I had never even considered flirting back with him seriously.
In the light of day, I know he is a good man. Someone who deserves better than I treated him last night. But in the light of day I also realize that so do I. Bryan has never sparked anything inside me and while I don’t want to hurt him, I know he never will.
“Sun is up, fishing is good. It’s a good day in Shore Ridge. Bronwyn,” His friendly smile falters a little as he walks out of his store to cross closer to me, “Last night, I know... well, I know there was another guy last night. I know you were upset, so you flirted with me for his sake. And I let you because... well, you know I don’t ever mind flirting with you. But, I hope it worked the way you wanted. Because, I know you better than to think you’d put that effort in if it didn’t matter to you.” Bryan’s confession shocks me. We share a look that says plenty about what we both know to be true.
“I would never want to hurt you, Bryan. I can’t say I didn’t do that without reason so I am sorry. You deserve better. You are a good man.” Bryan smiles widely and I realize he’s handsome too, but he shakes his head and gazes out towards the pier.
“Maybe I do. But, for me, Bronwyn,” We both look out at the pier that spreads out over the frothy sea, “For me, you would be more than enough. I am no romantic but I would never let you doubt that you deserve better too.” Reaching out, I take his hand and we share a moment. A moment that might almost be enough.
If a man like Rooker had not come to port.
Bryan gives me a soft smile and a squeeze before turning away. I know he means what he says but I wish he didn’t. Because I wonder if I would let him be enough. Even when now, I want so much more.
Walking down to the pier, I think back over a question of Rooker’s I keep coming back to. Over the past days, I talked to Rooker more than I had anyone in a long time. In just two days, he asked the one question no one else had bothered to before.
“But do you want to do that forever, Wyn?”
Took a stranger to ask something I was never brave enough to ask myself.
After my mother’s death, my panic attacks began. Every time I came to the pier, at first. I was so terrified of ending up just like her. Lost to the sea. Paps worked with me to get me brave enough to walk out on to the pier. Even down to the beach and a few feet into the sea.
Today I walk slowly down the pier, lost in thought. Little shops selling drinks or snacks and even seaside keepsakes line the wide planks. Above the salty sea air, the scent of popcorn and cotton candy mingles. I breathe deeply as I take a few steps out on to the pier.
Once my feet are firmly on the planks of the pier, I stop. Gaze out over the water rushing in foamy peaks beneath me. Out over the endless horizon. Smiling into the sunny skies, I breathe it all in again as the press of panic I expect fizzles and fades away.
In another life I thought I wanted to set out on the seas, too. Before my mother died, part of me wanted find whatever she thought she had lost out there. Another part just wanted to get away like my father had.
After Grams passed, I doubted I might ever leave Shore Ridge. My family had lived here since immigrating to the states from Belfast. Paps always talked about going back home someday, taking me and Grams to see the village our family had started in a century ago.
“The seas give and the seas take.”Grams said it so many times but in this moment I see her words for the truth they spoke.
Although the seas took both my parents—in vastly different ways—it brought me Paps and Grams. It brought life and prosperity to this tiny sea port town. It brought the families here that grew this town. Even though it took men from their families and broken hearts back out too, it gave just as much.
Today it gave me hope.
Touching the coin in my pocket as I reach the end of the pier, I smile into the sun. Waking up with that coin on my pillow, I wondered what fate might have given me. More than a night with Rooker, I was sure.
I wonder if he flipped it before leaving me this morning.
Wonder what fate had to tell him.
