Page 14 of Naughty & Nice
“No, you weren’t, baby,” she cuts me off, stepping out into the hall, dropping her arms as she comes close enough, I feel her skin on mine, “you were not over it just like I am not over it. We were never going to get over it because we are not something you get over.”
Her head tips back as she says what we both know. Empty attempts at moving on did nothing but set me back. I want to know if she made the same attempts. If she let someone else touch her but thought of me while they did it. I wonder if she spent the past years wishing any touch could feel good.
Before I can speak, either to agree or to argue, she moves. Silently she turns away, her hips swaying side to side and mesmerizing me. Turning to face me, she opens her door and tips her head inside. Frowning, I cock my head as I peer inside, wondering what she means. She doesn’t leave me wondering long.
“Come to bed, baby,” she says it softly, gently, almost patiently, as she steps back to invite me in.
Without a word, I move, grasping her by the waist as I head into the room. Before we reach the bed in the middle of the room, both our robes are gone. Beside the bed she turns down the covers as I run my hands over her silky skin. Dropping my head, I press my face into her neck, breathing deep the scent of her, wanting to stain my lungs with that sweetness.
When she lets out a soft hum, easing her body back against mine, my chest goes tight. My arms wind around her waist, tangling with hers as I hold her tight. In this moment, the past five years don’t even exist for me. Just the feel of her in my arms again, the sweet floral and peppermint scent of her, the brush of her skin on mine, and the feel of her heartbeat at my chest matter.
As if it’s second nature, we move into position like we did a hundred times before. Her back is snuggled to my front, my hand curving over her hip as my other arm slides beneath her neck. Twisting up her thick hair, she tucks it away and I press my lips to the back of her neck.
“I always liked this,” I admit against her skin as if I can hide my secrets.
“Me too. I don’t.... I never slept the same after I slept with you. Get some rest. It’s late. You also had no idea what you were about to walk into tonight. I am a coward I guess—making you come here instead of meeting you.”
“I asked before...why now? It’s been so long, Jos’,” I say with a kiss at her neck, feeling her pulse thud there.
“We can talk honestly in the dark, huh,” her voice smiles and I can just see the wistful tilt of her full lips, “to be frank I was stupid, terrified, shamed, and entirely too prideful. I walked away for the wrong reasons and stayed away for the same. Do not for one moment think it didn’t kill me to do both. I promise I hurt myself almost as much as I hurt you,” her voice shakes and I squeeze her closer, pressing a kiss at her shoulder to comfort her.
“I never should have asked so soon.”
Sighing sadly at the mess we made of things, I almost break away. We couldn’t make it work five years ago. Nothing I heard tonight says we can make it work now. My work is still my priority and clearly so is hers. Hell, she was so focused on her work she couldn’t come meet me even halfway.
Therein lies our issue—we cannot meet in the middle to make us work.
“Don’t overthink what we feel tonight,” she whispers, pushing her body back against mine and pulling my arms tighter around her, “why can’t we just let ourselves feel what we obviously feel? Broken hearts, b choices, five years, thousands of miles, none of it changed how we feel.”
“Nothing changed about our priorities either, sunshine,” I say gently, starting to pull away from her again.
“Please, don’t go. Just lie here with me tonight. Tomorrow we can talk. Let me have you back for one night.”
“Hush, sunshine. I will stay tonight. I need it as badly as you do.”
Last time I lost her without warning. One night she was in my arms every night and there every morning with her bright smile and sunshine laughter. The next it was quiet and empty without her. If I get just one night with her again, I will take it.
Even if it sends me into detox when I lose it all again.
