Page 15 of Stealing Her Heart
Standing there, I wonder if my father or mother ever loved me. I wonder if they hate me because of my brother. We lost him just a few years after I was born so I remember little about him. I do remember my father holding him up on his shoulder, beaming up at him with love. He has never looked at me that way.
It wasnotmy fault we lost him. I was wandering through the gardens as I often did. Still often do. We were playing a game, I think. He was there one minute then gone the next. I never understood what happened to him. All I remember is my mother wailing in despair as my father tried to hold her up. He was gone, they said. Gone and I was all that was left.
They blamed me, I think. I always felt they had. They grew obsessed about security. It was why they set a bodyguard while I was still a child. It might have come from a loving place—at first. Eventually it became about control, punishment. As if they wanted to punish me for what happened.
“It was notmy fault,” I whisper as I stuff a few last things in the bag.
Swiping at the tears falling fast, I shake my head. It took years for me to say that, to believe it, to understand that I could have done nothing to prevent it. Someone stole my brother out from under our parents. Because of who my father was, because of debts he owed. That is all I am to him now. A payment to Marconi for favors done or ones stillto bedone.
Jogging through the woods, I decide I won’t ever allow someone to rule me again. I thought with Gabriel it would work. That dynamic, letting him run the show, set the rules, draw the boundaries felt good. Letting go but knowing I had a choice, I had a voice and could use it, felt so good.
“Just another man who never sticks to his promises,” I huff as I head towards the train tracks. I will take the first train out of Silver Shores.
I do not care where it takes me. So long as it takes me the hell out of this place. It was another of my stupid dreams. Riding the rails to see the world, never tying myself to any one place. Now that I have been pushed to the edge, I suppose I might see that dream come true.
Hitting the station, I can almost taste freedom. I can hear it in the blare of the train horn, the bustle of other travelers. Going to the counter, I pull my wallet out with trembling hands. I am doing it. I am going. No one will ever find me if I can just get out of here.
“Heading somewhere,mi bella?”
Ice runs through my veins at the sound of Santino’s taunting voice. My jaw trembles because I am hit with a wave of hopelessness. Why? What have I done to deserve this? To never get to be free, to never have someone at my side. I am so tired. Just so fucking tired.
“Yeah, I was actually,” I answer before I whirl to face him.
“Where the hell were you running to?”
“Anywhere but here. With you. With my father. With all the men who’re just like you. All of you are evil, vindictive, pathetic boys.”
That little dreamer inside of me does a fist pump. The rest of me, not so much. His hand flies out fast, cracking me across the face. It stings. The heat of it tells me I will bruise something awful. Still, I do not cry out, I do not give him the satisfaction of seeing tears, I just stand there stoically.
“That’s how you talk to your future husband? Come, now. You were told to behave. We have an important dinner tonight.”
Wrapping his big mitt of a hand around my wrist, he yanks me after him towards a waiting car. A dozen pairs of eyes watch the whole scene unfold. Not one of them comes to my aid. No one bothers to do a thing.
Santino shoves me inside back of a town car, pushing in too close beside me. Yanking at my bag, he snorts at the few items I took time to pack. Pulling out a dress, he tosses it at me. Smacking my thigh, he tells me to change for the dinner we’re heading to.
“No. I am not going to dinner. I am not letting my father trade me off to you. There won’t be a wedding. Not between the two of us. I will run. I will get the fuck away from you and all of the other fucks like you.”
“We will find you. Found you tonight, didn’t I,mi bella?”
Frowning at him, I think about that for a moment. How did he find me? I have not seen him in days, why would he have even been looking for me. Suddenly a wave of panic hits me. What if they saw Stefano outside my father’s home? Watching for me, waiting for me as he claims Gabriel ordered him to. If they did…would they have hurt him?
Shaken by the thought, I reach for the door, as if I might jump out. Smirking once I see my hand, I laugh. Of fucking course. Sliding the hideous ring he put on my finger two months ago when I was told about this bullshit engagement, I hold it up. “Right here. How ever will you find me now, Santino?” Tossing it out of the car, it is lost to the streets.
“Cute. We will see how cute it is when I wrap a collar around your pretty fucking neck. I am not just keeping you here in Silver Shores,mi bella—I am keeping you locked up tight at home where you fucking belong. Who would even care? No one would even come looking for you.”
Turning away as his words cut me deep, I shake my head. What hurts the most is I know he is not wrong. For a brief moment, I let myself believe someone could care. Gabriel had done a number on me. He told me just what I wanted to hear. What I needed. I can’t even know he was not using me as a pawn the same as my father and Santino.
Cowering into the corner of the car, I nod my head. This is my fate. No one will come to rescue me. I will not have a knight in shining armor. Santino will get his way. Father will get his way. I am the tradeoff for their alliance. Even if Gabriel wanted to free me, how could he?
We were not set to get married just because Santino wanted to have me for himself. This is a business deal for him and my father. They have created an alliance between the Marconi’s and my father’s capo, his older brother. I am just collateral damage and nothing Gabriel does will change that.
“Get dressed, Gianna. Want you looking proper tonight.”
“How can I change now?” I wonder, hoping he doesn’t say what I know he will say. A filthy smirk twists his mouth as he reaches out, pulling at my loose sweats.
“Nothing under here that doesn’t belong to me. Give me a good look,mi bella. Ought to be willing to show it all to me,” he hums with a dirty sneer.
I consider leaping from the car even as it races down the streets, heading towards downtown. I do not want him to see me bare, vulnerable. Just the idea of him touching me the way I let Gabriel touch me makes bile rise up the back of my throat. Silent tears slip down my face as I pull my oversized hoodie off. Before I can make another move, his rough hands yank at my sweats, a ferocious growl sounding from him.
