Page 10 of Keeping Skylar
I pause, thinking back on all the places I’ve visited without Kaden that left a lasting impression, but I come up empty. Asidefrom a family trip to Venezuela when I was younger, there hasn’t been a place I’ve gone to lately without him by my side.
“There hasn’t really been a place where Kaden and I haven’t visited or lived together. Aside from my childhood home or school, most of the places I’ve been to are linked to him.”
“Okay. How about one place that held some of the best memories for you, whether it was with or without Kaden, where you can truly see yourself starting anew?” she presses as she shuts her laptop. “Think on it while I get us something to eat. I’m starving. Do you want anything?”
I shake my head, too anxious to eat anything.
She stands and walks over to the register to order her meal. I watch as she selects five different items from the menu, her eyes always bigger than her stomach. While waiting for her to return, I sit back and ponder her question for a moment.What is one place that has always brought me immense joy?
My mind drifts back to six years ago, after Kaden and I got married. We decided to build a new life together in another city, a fresh start as a married couple. After hours of brainstorming, we eventually settled on Melbourne. I had visited the city a few times in my late teens and instantly fell in love with the place and the people.
Unfortunately, immediately after our big move, Kaden began to feel homesick, missing his family, friends and old job. He was often restless and miserable, which only made him more irritable and short-tempered. This led to arguments that grew more heated with each passing day. After a year, we ultimately decided to move back to Sydney, in hopes of salvaging what was left of our marriage.
While we managed to get our relationship back on track, I, on the other hand, was missing our life in Melbourne. I loved the school I worked at, the people I made friends with, and theplaces we visited just outside the beautiful city. If it weren’t for Kaden, I would’ve happily stayed there forever.
Kirstin returns to the booth minutes later, and starts pouring water into both our glasses. “So? What did you come up with?”
“Melbourne.”
“Melbourne?” she repeats, looking a little puzzled. “Didn’t you guys leave that place after only a year because you weren’t happy there?”
“Correction, Kaden was the one who was unhappy. I loved it there. I was thriving professionally, met some wonderful like-minded people, and the vibe was much more vibrant and charming. It’s a big city. There are plenty of places where I never got to visit with Kaden,” I explain.
“Well, if deep down you believe that Melbourne is the place that brings you the most joy, who am I to judge? On the downside, the thought of you being so far away feels incredibly depressing. But on the upside, it’s miles away from Kaden and Lucia, and that’s a good enough explanation for me. Besides, it gives me more of a reason to travel to Melbourne beyond just attending exhibitions.”
Her food arrives seconds later, and the server places her eggs benedict on sourdough toast on the table, along with our second round of hazelnut lattes. Kirstin digs into her food right away, while I sit back and watch her eat like a toddler. I chuckle at the way she inhales her food, leaving crumbs and sauce smeared around her mouth, chin and fingers, as if to save it for later. This girl is utterly shameless.
As we sit in comfortable silence, the gears in my mind start turning as I envision a new life in Melbourne. A life without my family and friends nearby. A life without Kaden and Lucia. A life, all on my own.
I’m sitting in bed in Kirstin’s guestroom on a Saturday evening with an iPad on my lap and a paperback resting on a pillow beside me. For the past hour, I’ve been scrolling through various apartment listings in Melbourne, exploring what’s available.
After leaving the café, Kirstin and I spent some time wandering around the National Museum of Contemporary Art, followed by a picnic in the Royal Botanic Gardens. When we arrived back to her apartment, we popped open a couple bottles of wine and ate vegan pizza, while belting out our favourite 90s songs on karaoke. It was the first time in days that I genuinely laughed, letting go of everything and forgetting about what awaited me at home.
We decided to end the night by watching some of our favourite classics, until Kirstin could no longer fight to keep her eyes open, and called it a day.
Unable to sleep, I decided to get a head start looking at real estate in Melbourne. As I flick through the apartment listings, my thoughts wander back to the first time I met Kaden. It was after the time I finally succumbed to Kirstin’s relentless badgering of getting me to sign up to her martial arts gym. I would join her a few times a week with our trainer, learning how to box.
I remembered it was during the start of my third week of attending when Kirstin called to cancel our session because she had caught a stomach bug. Since I was already at the gym, I decided to go ahead and train on my own.
Having no clue what I was doing, and with absolutely no natural talent for boxing, I looked more like a drunken pirate with my arms flailing and flopping about as I tried, and failed time and time again, to land a good, solid punch on a heavy bag.
My sloppy attempts at jabbing caught the attention of several male members. But it was Kaden who approached me with alook of amusement on his face as he stood by watching my clumsy performance.
I laughed as he poked fun of my lack of coordination, commending me on my ‘unique’ style of punching. Deciding to finally save me from further embarrassment, he offered to help train me for the remainder of the afternoon. We ended up hitting it off almost immediately, and organised to train together on the days Kirstin couldn’t make it. After our fourth boxing session, Kaden finally asked me out on a date.
The attraction was instant. He was undeniably handsome and sexy. Tall, with tattoos, short sandy blond hair, piercing chartreuse green eyes, and a body that resembled that of a professional boxer. Over the years, he’s put on a little more muscle, his jawline’s sharper, and his golden skin now bears twice the number of tattoos.
After eating at a Brazilian BBQ for our first date, neither of us was ready to leave. We ended up in my car for three hours, just talking about everything and anything, with some occasional back-and-forth flirting. That night, we shared our first kiss. And the rest, as they say, is history.
My heart aches at the memory of our happier times. How am I supposed to trust another man, when the one who vowed to stay faithful to me, broke my trust completely? How do I even begin to start over after this?
I wipe the tears streaming down my cheeks with the back of my hand. I refuse to letthembreak me. To havetheirbetrayal destroy me. I deserve happiness. I deserve better. I continue my search for apartments, determined more than ever to put this plan in motion. As soon as I’m done with the house hunting, I’ll start looking for jobs next. In fact, I could probably contact my old employer.
Before I left Melbourne, the principal of the school where I used to work promised me I’d always be welcomed back.Hoping the offer still stands, I log in to my Gmail and quickly send Loretta an email. It’s been six years, and the chances of a position being available are slim, but I’m willing to try just about anything at this point.
Once the email is sent, I switch back to the real estate site, to continue my search for a new life and a new place to call my own.
CHAPTER 5
