Page 83 of Secrets and Seashells at Rainbow Bay
Currently we’re going through any drawers, chests, or anything really where someone might have hidden a diary.
‘Benji didn’t really have a chance to continue with his story when Dorothy came into the kitchen, did he?’ Tom continues, closing up yet another empty drawer in the bedroom we’re currently in. ‘He seems to think it might be quite serious, though.’
‘Yeah, I know. I wondered if it might be some sort of proof that Clara was gay. I know that sort of thing doesn’t matter these days, but back then I bet it would have been a huge scandal.’
‘It sure would,’ Tom says. ‘But knowing Benji, I’m sure it isn’t likely to be that.’
‘Yes, I haven’t known Benji as long as you but he doesn’t seem to be one to create drama for the sake of it.’ I close the doors on the wardrobe I’ve been looking in.
‘No, definitely not. He’s straight down the line is our Benji. Well, as straight as Benji is ever going to get!’ Tom grins.
‘What do you mean?’ I ask, pulling open the small side drawers on a pretty dressing table.
Tom stops what he’s doing and looks at me.
‘Are you messing with me?’ he asks. ‘You must know Benji is gay.’
I swivel around on my stool and stare at him.
‘Obviously I was wrong,’ Tom says. ‘You didn’t know.’
My mind rushes through everything I know about Benji, and suddenly a few things click into place. But equally some other things do not.
‘But Benji told me he only knew you because he dated your sister – that’s how you two met.’
Tom grins. ‘I don’t have a sister. Only the one brother – Joe. Well, Joseph to give him his full name. That’s who I went to see this weekend.’
I think about this, and then I cringe when I realise my mistake. ‘Oh, I must have assumed Joe was a girl when Benji mentioned him the first time. So that’s why Benji was a bit funny with you when you said you’d been to visit your brother – his ex! God, I feel so silly now.’ I bury my red-hot face in my hands.
‘Don’t be. Obviously I’ve known Benji for a long time and I’ve always known he was gay because of Joe. But to be fair if I hadn’t I probably wouldn’t know either. It’s not something he makes a big deal about. I’m surprised he never mentioned it, though. You two seem quite close.’
‘Yes, we are. I guess there was never a need for him to say anything. Perhaps he assumed I already knew.’ I think about this, and I wonder if this might have been what Benji was trying to tell me up in the tower the night we ended up talking about Tom.
I feel bad that I might have stopped him from sharing something so important to him.
‘If I didn’t know Benji was gay I’d have been quite jealous of the two of you together all the time,’ Tom continues.
‘Would you?’ I ask innocently, pulling myself from my thoughts about Benji. ‘Why?’
‘Oh, Amelia,’ Tom says, coming over to where I’m still sitting at the dressing table and kneeling down next to me. ‘You must know how much I like you. Haven’t I made it plain enough?’ He takes hold of my hands and I have to fight my natural reaction to pull away from him.
‘Maybe I just missed the signs,’ I say shyly, willing myself not to retreat into my protective shell like I always do.
‘Really? I’ve tried to make it pretty clear.’
I look down into Tom’s blue eyes, and I see a man desperate to make me understand how he feels.
Let him in, Amelia, I hear my inner voice instructing me.It’s time.
‘Perhaps you should try a little harder then,’ I say quietly and I allow my hand to reach out and gently touch his cheek.
Tom closes his eyes at my touch, and when he opens them again he finds my lips millimetres from his.
‘Amelia,’ he murmurs, but annoyingly I don’t hear him, my ears are trying to listen to something else.
‘What was that?’ I ask, looking away from him for a moment.
‘Nothing,’ Tom murmurs, gently turning my face back towards his.
