Page 56 of It Always Snows on Mistletoe Square
‘Rudy told me,’ Estelle says quietly.
‘Rudy …ourRudy?’
Estelle nods. ‘He’s seen Father out and about a few times with his women, and I may have asked him to follow him a couple of times too.’
‘And Rudy did that … for you?’ Clara asks, astonished. ‘That goes far beyond the duties we employ him for … Ah,’ she says, an understanding look in her eyes. ‘I see now.’
‘What do you mean – yousee?’
‘Have you taken a shine to our Rudy, Estelle? It’s completely understandable if you have – he’s a handsome young man. But you mustn’t become a bother to him.’
‘I haven’ttaken a shineto him, Mother,’ Estelle says calmly, but with a steeliness to her voice I’ve heard in our own Estelle before. ‘I love him. And before you say anything, he loves me too. We’re in love.’
Clara stares at Estelle.
‘You are in love with Rudy?’ she whispers.
‘Yes, I am,’ Estelle says proudly.
‘But you can’t be.’ Clara’s voice is still low.
‘Yes. I can,’ Estelle replies defiantly.
I glance over at our Estelle. She stands quietly by the window and gazes out of it, as though she can’t quite bear to witness this part of her history over again.
‘How long has this been going on?’ Clara asks. She’s calm, but I sense there’s a great deal of anxiety behind her gentle voice.
‘For a few months,’ Estelle says. ‘No one but us knows. I suspect Holly might have an idea, but she hasn’t let on. If you’re worried about Father, he certainly does not know.’
‘That I know to be true. If your father had any idea, Rudy would have been thrown out of this house a long time ago.’
‘You won’t tell him, will you, Mother?’ Estelle asks, looking worried.
Clara shakes her head. ‘No. Of course I won’t.’
‘When I turn eighteen, we intend to get married,’ Estelle says, her eyes lighting up at the thought. ‘I know that Father will try to stop us, but I don’t care. We will run away if necessary.’
Clara sighs. ‘My dear child.’ She lifts her delicate hand and caresses Estelle’s cheek. ‘What I’m about to say next I detest myself for already.’
‘Then don’t say it,’ Estelle says, sensing what might be coming. ‘I know you want me to be happy, Mother, don’t you?’
‘Of course I do, my love. That’s all I want for you, but … ’ Clara hesitates and shakes her head again. ‘No, I cannot say it. I will not say it.’
‘Say it, Mother,’ Estelle demands. ‘I want to know.’
‘It’s your father,’ Clara says, after taking a deep breath. ‘I’m worried he will bankrupt us … and soon if he carries on. He’s never been quite the same since he lost his job in publishing and went into finance. He lost such a lot of money during the Great Depression after investing in that American company. I told him he shouldn’t, but he was insistent that it would be a legacy for you and his future grandchildren.’
Estelle’s face darkens as Clara speaks.
‘My friend Mariah came to visit me last week, and she told me that your father is borrowing money all over town. He even asked Bing, Mariah’s husband, for money the other day. I was mortified when Mariah told me. It’s his gambling, Estelle. If he carries on, I am afraid he will lose this house. I … I simply cannot have that. This house has been in my family for hundreds of years; I can’t lose it. I can’t. It’s my home. Where would I go, what would I do if I can’t live here?’
Clara’s face crumples and she begins to cry.
Estelle immediately begins to comfort her. ‘Please don’t upset yourself, Mother. And please don’t worry, I will make sure that never happens.’
‘But how?’ Clara sobs. ‘Your father’s gambling is a habit I don’t think he can stop. My one hope had been that you would marry well and your husband would provide for you and save us from becoming homeless and destitute. But now you’ve fallen for a servant, and I don’t begrudge you that, Estelle, really I don’t – love is a wonderful thing – especially when it’s reciprocated, and Rudy is a lovely young man. Ivy brought her children up well, but I do worry for both of our futures if your father carries on the way he has been of late.’
‘You must not concern yourself, Mother,’ Estelle says firmly. ‘You always said nothing good ever came of worrying. I will make sure Father does not lose all our money or this house in any gambling game. I do not intend to marry for money or for duty, Mother. I will marry for love – just like the King.’
