Page 86 of It Always Snows on Mistletoe Square
‘I’m serious. Don’t you ever think you’re weak because you show emotion. You’re brave and strong and kind and … and I love you,’ I finish, hoping now is the right moment to tell him.
Ben gazes at me with a mix of wonder and amazement. ‘If you don’t know this already … I love you too, Elle. We’ve known each other for six days, and yet it doesn’t feel at all wrong to tell you that already.’
‘I know. But how I feel about you, it scares me a lot.’
‘Why?’
‘Because I’ve been hurt in the past – badly – and I was scared of having my heart broken again. I’d made a pact with myself that I was only going to care about me from now on. But then Estelle and Angela and you came along, and I found myself caring more about all of you than I ever thought possible.’
‘Elle, I would never break your heart. Because if I did, I’d be breaking mine as well.’
‘Oh, Ben … ’ I say, taken aback by his words. ‘What have we done to deserve each other this Christmas?’
‘Obviously something rather special,’ Ben says as we reach for each other again. The cold of the December afternoon is the furthest thing from our minds as we embrace and then snuggle together on the bench.
‘Call your parents, Elle,’ Ben says suddenly, as we sit with our thoughts for a moment. ‘Call them while you still can.’
‘Maybe later,’ I say, not wanting to think about this. ‘I’m more than happy here with you right now.’
‘I’d do anything to be able to speak to my real mother,’ Ben continues, not letting it go. ‘To find out more about why she gave me up. Don’t get me wrong, my adoptive parents looked after and cared for me, I had a happy childhood and I wanted for nothing. I love them and they love me. We told each other that this morning for the first time in … well, I don’t know how long. I don’t have a problem with them at all – they were there when I needed them and I’ll be forever grateful. My issue is with the woman that gave up her child. If only I could find out why, maybe then I’d have closure.’
‘I’ll call them tonight,’ I tell him. ‘I promise. I’ll do it for you.’
‘No, Elle,’ Ben says firmly. ‘You’ll do it for yourself and for your parents. If Estelle’s stories have taught us nothing else, they’ve shown us family is everything, whether that’s the family you’re born into, or the family you choose to live with, and we need to appreciate it while we can. Especially at Christmas.’
‘So,’ Estelle says as we all sit around the dinner table after enjoying another of Angela’s delicious meals. This time beef Wellington with green beans and fluffy white potatoes. ‘How have you found living here in this house, Elle? Is it everything you expected it to be?’
I’m slightly thrown by Estelle’s question.
‘Er … I’m not sure what I expected,’ I reply. ‘Certainly not the level of detail that I’ve experienced hearing all your stories.’
Estelle smiles. ‘I do pride myself on my storytelling abilities. I am glad you have enjoyed them so much.’
‘Are there many more?’ Ben asks. ‘I’m not sure I was ever supposed to be involved in all this, but I’m kind of glad I am.’ He looks over at me, smiles and squeezes my hand.
Estelle looks at our hands clasped together on the table. ‘You were always going to be involved, Ben,’ she says. ‘That was never in doubt.’
Ben looks as puzzled by this statement as I am. ‘What do you mean?’ he asks.
‘Oh, nothing.’ Estelle casually waves her hand.
‘It’s a funny thing to say, though,’ Ben continues.
‘I think Estelle meant that from the moment you came in and fixed the lights on the tree we could see you had a thing for our Elle,’ Angela says quickly. ‘Love was always going to be in the air between you two.’
‘You must have known something we didn’t then!’ I laugh. ‘The last thing I wanted when I came here was a new relationship, I can tell you.’
‘Me too,’ Ben says. ‘But I’m glad I’ve got one now.’ And again we exchange an affectionate look.
‘That’s the first part of the plan actioned,’ Estelle says approvingly. ‘Now for part two.’
Ben and I look at each other, this time with equally confused expressions. I’m about to ask what Estelle means, when she speaks again.
‘Do you have everything you need now, Elle? To write about my family and this house?’
‘I think so, yes. But is that it, then – no more stories to add? I’d hoped we’d go a bit further – we’ve only got to 1962. I appreciate that you and Angela must have lived here from then until now, but there must be something else that happened here at Christmas over that time.’
‘Yes, there definitely is, and it’s possibly one of the most important Christmases we ever had here.’
