Page 123 of From Notting Hill with Love…Actually
“Actually, Mum had nothing to do with any of my movie scenes. I only met her for the first time a few days ago. But she has told me thewholestory as to why she came to leave you in the first place.”
My father’s eyes darted up at me.
“She’s what?” he said in a low voice.
“I asked her to. I wanted to know everything that happened back then. But why, Dad? Why would you risk it all happening again? Did you want me to run away, like Mum?”
“Oh, my darling Scarlett, no, of course I didn’t.” Dad stood up now too and reached his hand out toward me. “It…it’s complicated.”
“Tell me, Dad, please. I need to know your side of the story too. So I can fully understand.”
He nodded and gestured for us to sit again. Then he took a deep breath.
“As much as it hurts me to say this, Scarlett, you’ve always been like your mother—not only in looks. So however hard I tried I could never get rid of the memory of her altogether. And unfortunately, I could see you beginning to make the same mistakes she did.”
“So you thought you’d send me away, just like you did her?” I asked. “How was that going to help?”
My father shook his head. “No, let me finish, Scarlett. You have a good life and a good job—no, business; it belongs to us both equally. And more importantly, you have a good manwho wants to marry you and spend the rest of his life with you. Davidisa good man; you do know that, don’t you?”
I nodded. “Yes, of course I do.”
“But you still weren’t happy, Scarlett. I could tell that. You were growing increasingly dissatisfied with everything—just like your mother was all those years ago. It frightened me seeing you beginning to turn into her. So when David came to see me and told me how worried he was about you, I knew I had to do something to help.
“So that’s when I suggested we give you the same chance I had your mother. I knew it was a risk—but it was a risk worth taking for your sake.”
“But why—what would it achieve if it didn’t work out the first time?”
“That’s true—it didn’t work out well formeback then. But I’m guessing it worked out well for your mother. I bet if you ask her now she’s glad she took the opportunity to get away from me and didn’t continue living what she would now consider the boring life I have.”
I decided now was not the time to be telling Dad about Mum’s very colorful, yet quite unstable past.
“But what I still don’t get is why do it all again? Why persuade David to do something that worked out so badly for you?”
“Because I love you, Scarlett—and there’s nothing that means more to me in my life than your happiness. But I knew if you married David, and continued the same way as you were, you wouldn’t ever be truly happy and neither would David. You’d always be wondering ‘What if?’ I know what it’s like living with someone like that, Scarlett. I did it for long enough,and let me tell you it’s far from easy. And what if it had gone on longer and you’d ended up like your mother? I wouldn’t want that for you or for David. Even though I wouldn’t change our time together for the world, Scarlett, the aftermath of one parent leaving and trying to bring up a child alone is so hard I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”
I was feeling really guilty now. I was putting my dad through all this unnecessary hurt. He’d done so much for me, and this is how I was repaying him.
“Plus, Scarlett, Iknewif you went away on your own for a while you’d almost certainly try to live out this wonderful life you think everyone has in the movies, and I hoped you’d quickly realize that no one really lives like that—and it’s all made up. Then if my plan went well, you’d return home and be content with what you’d got. You’d be happy with David and happy with me—just like your mother wasn’t able to be.”
“Oh, Dad,” I said, leaning forward across the settee and putting my hands over his. “I’ve always been happy with you—that was never in question. You were right though; Iwasunhappy with the way things were back in Stratford. But what if it had gone wrong, what if Ihadfound something better—then what?”
“Scarlett, only you can answer that question.Haveyou found something better?”
I thought hard. Had I found something better here in London than I’d known back home? I’d met new friends, had new experiences, yes. But was it better than my life before? I tried not to think about Sean.
I took a deep breath. “Yes, I have, Dad. I have found something better since I’ve been here. It may not be something life-changingin the way either of us hoped it might be when I left, but it’s certainly changed mine for the better. And that something is Mum.”
I waited for the explosion to come from my father. But strangely it didn’t.
He sat back on the sofa looking thoughtful.
“Is that theonlything you’ve found since coming here, Scarlett? Your mother?”
“How do you mean?”
“I mean, you said yourself you only met up with her in the past few days. What about the rest of the time you’ve been here? You must have met some other people and had some other experiences you’ve learned from?”
Just what was my father getting at?
