Because my father hadn’t been killed with mercy at the hands of Andre, who had once been considered a friend of the family.
I went back to my desk to spend another day keeping my men and their families alive. When the daylight began to fade into dark mist, I walked upstairs to my room. I hadn’t slept in days.Every time I closed my eyes, I imagined Tommaso on the table with Sera’s hand in his chest.
And thinking of Sera kept me up in a different way. Watching her blossom into a fiery, defiant force of a woman made it very, very difficult to keep my hands off her.
I should have kissed her last night. I should have grabbed her around the waist and thrown her on the bed and done what I’d been imagining. Her body, so supple and ripe in my hands. Her mouth, soft and hot and desperate against my own.
Her father’s games would be the least of my worries if I let Sera become my weakness, and I had never considered myself to be a weak man by any means.
If I claimed her body, I would lay waste to her soul. I knew that much. She would never be free again. She would never be safe, and it would break her.
Like it broke my mother.
CHAPTER 37
SERA
Another day of confinement.
I spent the first hour of my day trying to pick the lock in the sitting room, to no avail. I ran out of bobby pins eventually and resorted to using a makeup brush to try to pry the locks on the windows open, snapping the brush in two. Even though I knew every attempt would fail, it helped me pass the time.
Olivia brought in breakfast and I did my best to be friendly, which only made her suspicious. She left, and I picked at eggs and toast like a bird at frosty soil.
I did everything in my power to remain sharp, but I was slowly losing my mind as the days passed and blurred together.
The morning sunlight turned overcast, and rain began to trickle down the windows. I lay down on the carpet and watched the shadows play over the ceiling, doing my best to focus on escape and not think of Killian. What I would have done for a worthy distraction. I needed a TV in here. Then again, that could spell disaster. If I had a TV I’d slip into a void of nothingness, spending day in and day out lounging in bed, staring at the screen, disassociating. No, it was better to keep my wits about me, even if that brought me to the threshold of insanity.
A while later, Francesco showed up at my door again. He didn’t indulge me in any conversation as he took me to Tommaso’s room. I had it in mind to ask Tommaso why Francesco seemed pulled tight. He seemed to vibrate with barely contained tension. Violence seemed to hum inside him, begging for release. I assumed a raid had been planned, or some other excitement that would mean I’d be sewing someone shut again before they bled out on the dining-room table. I wasn’t alone with Tommaso today, though.
Delaney turned to me as the door to Tommaso’s room snapped shut. Her shoulder-length blonde hair danced as she smiled, her eyes going wide.
Why did she look so familiar?
“I knew there was someone else with me,” she said, turning back to Tommaso. “Why didn’t you say anything about it?”
“I’m already in a position to getfixed, Delaney, don’t push it.” He narrowed his eyes at her. I wondered how he’d accomplished this, getting us together. His tone told me there was risk involved, but I didn’t push him to tell me how he’d managed this, likely under Killian’s nose.
Delaney gave me a look over her shoulder that said,Don’t worry about him. “Were you auctioned off, too?”
I hadn’t thought about the auction in what felt like forever. That whole experience had been blurred in my mind, like it happened to someone else or in a movie. I moved to an armchair near the window, where I could feel cool air on my face through the screen, and took a deep breath to clear the fuzzy return of memories that were still too close for comfort. Tires biting into gravel. Men laughing. A red silk dress. The never-ending darkness under the hood…
I finally nodded. “Yes, I was.”
“I’ve never been so scared in my entire life.” Delaney’s words echoed through the room. Tommaso shifted on the bed. Thevelvet blankets whispered with every careful movement, as if reminding him to be careful of his wounds. “And now we’re here,” Delaney continued, “and I’m even more terrified. This house is so scary, isn’t it? So dark and ominous. Ricci’s favorite color must be black because it’s everywhere. I’m never sure what time it is because it’s just dark, always. It must be haunted.”
I glanced at Tommaso, who had a glazed look in his eyes. Delaney, who was rather chipper and excited for someone being held against her will, went on and on. I barely said a word. Delaney wasn’t what I’d expected her to be. She was my age, maybe a little older, but her countenance was girlish and desperate in nature. She could talk, that was for sure, and soon her voice started to grate on me. As a schoolteacher, I had a long rope when it came to patience, especially for chatty girls. Why did this feel so uncomfortable for me? I wanted to crawl out of my skin the more she talked.
It was obvious she was part of thefamily. She’d grown up in this kind of world, had been trained to be obedient, doing what needed to be done without a fight. But she hadn’t learned to keep her mouth shut when necessary, and to watch, listen, and horde information to sell to the highest bidder.
We were very different.
I wished, for a moment, that Tommaso and I were alone.
But eventually she circled back to the auction, sitting down on the edge of Tommaso’s bed to face me. “Did you see anyone you knew?”
“In the crowd?” I inquired.
She shook her head. “Backstage. I saw women I knew.”