Page 49 of Lady Dragon
Samansa couldn’t even be irked at the dragon’s condescension; she was crying so hard. “Branon killed Jamsens,” she finally managed, her voice sounding strangled and small. She didn’t know if Kirek would even hear her over the wind. “He was only trying to protect me. Branon killed him like it was nothing, and yet they grew up practically like brothers. Branon always acted more like a brother to him than he ever has to me.”
You can see how much he values family, then, Kirek mused, and paused.I know Jamsens meant a lot to you, even if—even if it wasn’t how you mattered to him.
“Yes.” Samansa swallowed with effort around the lump in her throat. “That’s why I… I did those things.” A soft, vague summation of the bloody, burning destruction she’d wrought.
I assumed as much, Kirek said. I’m sorry for his death. And that I didn’t deliver you Branon’s.
Samansa surprised herself by exclaiming, “I don’t want him dead! I mean, not exactly.”
That’s not what it looked like back there. He would have deserved death, and worse.
The princess shook her head, though not entirely in denial. “What he’s said and done is awful, but I—what I did wasn’t much different,” she murmured, the words vanishing in the rush of air. “I acted positively monstrous.”
Rather, assuming she had even acted as herself. She hadn’t felt in control; more like something had taken control of her. Would it be better or worse if she hadn’t been responsible for what she’d done—if a monstrous forcehadovertaken her?
You didn’t kill the human family.
Samansa’s stomach roiled, and for a moment she feared she might be sick all over Kirek’s scales. “I only didn’t because you stopped me. And all of those soldiers…”
They were trying to hurt you. I killed some of them, too, thank you very much.
Kirek’s attempt at humor didn’t make Samansa’s lips so much as twitch. She pressed her forehead into the warm, hard scales of the dragon’s neck. “I don’t trust myself anymore. I can’t be around anyone.”
You can be around me.There was a longer pause between Kirek’s silent words.And perhaps other dragons.
“I’m scared,” Samansa admitted quietly. “I don’t think we have any other choice, but—what if the dragons kill me?”
They’ll have to kill me first. And I don’t believe my mother will allow that. The pair-bond is respected above nearly all else.
Samansa had her doubts, but she had no recourse but to trust Kirek.
And she did trust Kirek. She wasn’t entirely sure why. The dragon girl had meant to assassinate her less than a day ago. Yes, there was the bond, but Samansa didn’t feel it herself. She felt something else—something more human, in response to Kirek. Something that Kirek had claimed to feel somewhat, herself. Her admission was the only thing that had snapped Samansa out of her red rage.
And I’m a fool, Samansa thought miserably.Kirek doesn’twantto feel this way.
And Samansa probably feltmorethat way than Kirek did, which was already detestable to the dragon.
It isn’t love, Kirek had insisted.
Samansa wasn’t so sure, on her end.
How could she love a dragon? And then she pictured the silver flash of Kirek’s eyes, even that of her metallic scales, and how she moved with lethal grace and unearthly beauty, and knew it was the least of the impossible things that had befallen her.
Samansa didn’t want to ask, but she did anyway, in a whisper, screwing her eyes even more tightly shut as if she could hide from what was coming. “Do you really think we’re cursed?”
Yes.The dragon’s answer was so simple, and yet so heavy. Once more, it felt like earth rising up to meet Samansa as she fell.
“What should we do?” Samansa coughed a little laugh. “Other than maybe feed me to the dragons.”
We have to find out the nature of the curse, and try to break it, Kirek said matter-of-factly, as if it were no monumental task.
Samansa tried to make her voice light, even though she felt flattened under the immensity of it all. “Seems as though we’ve already broken enough, with the Heartstone.”
We have to fix the Heartstone, then.
Samansa grimaced to herself. They couldn’t exactly try to fit the two pieces back together, return the stone to its original place, and hope no one would notice it had broken in the first place, like Samansa had once done with one of her mother’s priceless vases. The shards had sunk deeper into their chests—which might kill Samansa, at least, were they to try to pry them out while in human form—and which were utterly hidden and impossible to reach while in dragon form. And one of them was always in dragon form, as they were now. But that wasn’t Samansa’s only concern.
“What if fixing the Heartstone means that you have to…undo… the pair-bond?” She couldn’t help it—the thought made her terribly sad. It was what had kept Kirek from killing her. And perhaps it was what made Kirek feelmorefor her—whatever that was.
