Page 105 of Tomorrow Belongs to Us
“I’m trying.”
“Will you always be content to be in second place?” There’s a small blob of chocolate on her lower lip which irritates me. But her sentence irritates me more. I don’t remember Arla ever not liking the guys I was with. Even the douchebags who left me waiting for meals and movies and events. Even the guy who borrowed money from me and never paid it back.
But Lance, who has never taken but has always given and who has always been here for me, she seems not to like.
“You have chocolate on your lip.” I gesticulate by pointing to the exact location on my lower lip.
She licks it off. “Maybe it’s not such a bad thing, you moving away.” She’s happy that I’ll be away from Lance, and I’m suddenly eager to finish eating and leave here.
Chapter 39
LANCE
The situation is far worse than Cassie led me to believe.
My ex-wife drank herself into a stupor and because that wasn’t enough, she took a ton of pills.
By the time I got to the house, she'd been rushed to the hospital. Mila said Vivian was drowsy, and was talking a lot of nonsense, and she wasn’t herself. The housekeeper got worried which was when Cassie called me, but soon after Vivian lost consciousness and that was when Mila called 911.
Because no one else was at home, Mila stayed with Cassie. My daughter was a mess. I felt like a failure. I’m supposed to keep this family together, but Vivian made it impossible, and now this has happened and my daughter’s suffering. It’s a big, stinking mess. Vivian likes to drink, but she’s never taken pills before. It wasn’t until Mila showed me the empty bottle that I believed her.
After calming my daughter down, trying to answer her when she blames me for making Mommy sad, I go to the hospital to see my ex-wife.
To my relief there’s no sign of her parents anywhere and I pray that they’ve left. I sit by Vivian's bedside. Her eyes are closed and she looks peaceful. The only motion is that of her chest rising and falling. It's a comfort, a huge relief, that she’s breathing. That she will be okay. The doctor I spoke to told me that it was lucky my wife was found so quickly. That, this could have been fatal. The doctor goes on to tell me that this is a cry for help. I think it’s a cry for attention, but I keep my thoughts to myself. They’ve pumped her stomach and put her on IV fluids. They want to keep her in overnight for observation, but she will be able to go home tomorrow.
Vivian will keep me dancing to her tune, which means having no life of my own, doing what she wants, because that is who Vivian is. A master manipulator.
I stare up at the ceiling, a loud exhale leaving my lungs as I try to figure out my life, and my short-lived new freedom.
Vivian will recover, she will be fine, she might need more therapy—Vivian is always in therapy—but it's my daughter I worry about more. I jolt when I look at her and find that she's been staring at me the whole time. It's creepy.
“How are you feeling?” I ask, sitting forward, wanting her to be okay.
“Happy now that you’re here.”
“Why did you do it?”
She stares at me.
“Why did you take the pills, Vivian?”
“I can't live without you, Lance. I want things to be how they were.”
And how were they?
My ex-wife lives a glamorous life, and she has no remorse for her infidelity or her behavior. She does what she wants with no regard for others.
Not even Cassie.
And now that I’ve chosen to walk away, to sever the ties that bind us, she can’t cope. I won’t be a part of her victimhood. “What were you thinking?”
“I can’t live without you. I don’t want to. I want you back in our lives. Think about our family, think about Cassie.”
I cringe inside. I asked the wrong question. She interprets my silence as me being interested in what she has to say. Perhaps in her crazy deluded mind, she thinks I’m considering her words.
“It was a silly thing to do, Vivian. You scared us. You scared Cassie. Why would you do something like that?”
“Because I love you. Because I can't imagine my life without you.”
