Page 119 of Every Broken Piece
He kisses me like it’s the only thing keeping him alive. Like he wouldn’t be able to breathe if he didn’t kiss me. Like I’m his breath, his heartbeat, his reason.
And I kiss him back because I know he’s my reason.
And that scares the hell out of me.
Chapter fifty-three
Tess
Gabe: Dinner out tonight? I should be home at 6. Dress casual
Iwas ready way before six because I didn’t know what I’d packed that I could wear to dinner with Gabe. He said casual so I settled for my favorite pair of jeans and a pink and white checked flannel over a white t-shirt. I hope this isn’t too casual but without knowing where we’re going, I have no idea.
I’m nervous. I’ve slept beside him the last two nights, yet I don’t know how to act on a date. Is this a date? He didn’t specifically say.
After our midnight snack the other night, we returned to bed. He wrapped me in his arms, and we fell asleep. The next night he didn’t even question when I followed him into his room. He’s never pushed for sex, although I know it’s not because he doesn’t want to. I’ve woken up pressed against him two mornings in a row. I can feel his desire for me. I’m thankful that he seems content to wait because I’m not there yet. I’m just now gettingused to the casual kisses as he walks by, the slide of his hand on my shoulder, or his palm pressed against the small of my back. He seems to know that I need to go slow, and he appears to be fine with that.
Yesterday after he left for work, I searched for jobs. I also half-heartedly looked at apartments. Staying in Denver isn’t even a question anymore. Even thought my mind tells me to get my own place, put some distance between us to see if what I’m feeling for him is the real deal, my heart yearns to stay here.
I check my phone and see that I have fifteen minutes before Gabe gets home, so I call Amelia. We’ve texted off and on, but I haven’t heard her voice since I left Cincinnati.
“Girl, I was just thinking about you,” Amelia says by way of answering.
“Yeah? What were you thinking?”
“How much I miss you, but also how happy I am that you’re with your hunky man.”
“He’s not my man.”
But he is, my mind whispers.
She laughs. “Stop. You know he is.”
My feelings are so convoluted and barely make sense to me. I don’t know how I’d explain them to Amelia.
“How’s Denver?” she asks.
“Beautiful. Cold. We went hiking the other day. I didn’t know there were such beautiful places like this.”
“I saw the pictures you sent me. They’re gorgeous.”
“Maybe you can visit sometime.” Amelia is the only friend I’ve ever had who’s stuck with me. She’s my first best friend and I’m pretty sure Gabe wouldn’t care if she came for a visit.
“So does that mean you’re staying?”
I wander to the huge windows and stare at the mountain peak in the distance, imagining myself living here. Making this mypermanent home. Not a place to land until I’m forced to move on. Not temporary.
My forever home.
“Amelia,” I whisper. “I think I’m falling in love with him.”
Amelia squeals. “I’ve beenwaitingfor this. Oh, Tess. I’m so happy for you. You deserve this happiness. Have you told him?”
“No.” Will there ever be a day that fear doesn’t hold me back?
“Has he told you how he feels?”
“Yes.” In so many ways other than words. Bubble gum toothpaste. Blankets. Sunsets and long walks. Just bringing me here alone tells me how he feels.
