Page 59 of How to Ruin Your Ex's Wedding
“Glad I could entertain,” I mumble.
“When is it?”
“The wedding?”
“Yeah, man. When is the wedding?”
“In, like, seven weeks.”
“Seven weeks exactly? From today? Or . . . ?”
“I don’t know, maybe seven weeks from Saturday then. They just kept saying two months and that was, like, a week ago.”
“Well, how were you going to know when to show to take the pictures?”
“Someone was sure to tell me at some point. I don’t have much else going on.”
“Some of us do have other shit going on, man. I need a date and a time.”
“Okay, okay, I’ll get it for you. But once I do, you can’t say that you’re busy or some shit like that.”
“Hmmph.” Gregor grunts, then switches topics. “So, you’re not the photographer anymore?”
“Nah. I passed it off to Toby Benson. He’s a local, and totally pumped to get the referral.”
“Great, so now you can be my plus-one,” Gregor says, a villainous smile on his face.
“Oh no. No way. I am not going to that wedding. Besides, Wimpycock would have a fit, and Tabby would be the one who would suffer.”
“He won’t even know you’re there. Didn’t you say they’ve got, like, seven hundred people coming?”
“I said that venue could hold up to that many. I don’t know how many they’ll invite. I think it’s going to depend on where they have it.”
“So, what do I have to do when I’m there?”
“None of that came up. I think he just wants to know you’re going to be there. He idolizes you or some shit. You should have seen his face light up when I said your name. Go figure.”
“Shut up, man. I’m important to people. I’m like a fucking figurehead.”
We both laugh at that.
“Leslie,” Gregor calls out to his bartender. “Aren’t I important?”
“Yes, sir,” she replies. “Themostimportant. Mr. VIP is what you are.”
Gregor looks at me as if to say,see?
“You sign her paychecks; her opinion doesn’t count.”
I finish off my beer and hold my empty pint glass up toward him. “Another round? My treat?”
He waves his hand dismissively in my direction and picks up his beer to finish it off. “Your treat? That’s funny. Like you ever pay for anything here.”
“It’s the thought that counts, man.”
“Okay.” He motions to Leslie for another round. “One more, then I gotta get back to work,” he says. “I’ve got a ton of paperwork back there to finish up.”
Leslie sets fresh pints in front of us. “Thanks, Les,” Gregor says.
