Page 86 of Love Resurrected
Because shewillmake it out of here. And so will the baby.
They have to.
30
Brad
I’m not going to lie. Even though Kat didn’t pass away in a hospital, being here, waiting like this, brings back way too many bad memories for me to be comfortable with. I know there are a million ways for me to be a better friend to E right now. But somehow, the most I can conjure is the occasional pat on the shoulder. He was so much better at this with me than I am with him. Further proof positive I’m a selfish bastard.
I let Tenley rest her head on my shoulder after she hit it on the wall, something she’s now doing again without prompting. On some level, I find it to be comforting and stabilizing. Her hair smells good, like the same vanilla and coconut scent she usually has, but with an added freshness. It makes me wonder if all her bath products have the same scent, or if it’s just her.
Her head feels heavy on my shoulder and I wonder if she’s fallen asleep. I can’t move to see without disrupting her, but if she’s sleeping, I want to let her continue. If she isn’t, I’d like her to try to convince Ethan to sit down. I’m worried that all this pacing is just making him more anxious instead of calming him down.
As though she reads my mind, Tenley stands and moves over to Ethan, taking his hand and leading him back to where we’re sitting, for probably the third time tonight.
“I can’t sit, Ten,” Ethan says.
“You’re too worked up,” Tenley answers. “You need to relax a bit, if you can. If you stay hyped, you will have an adrenaline crash, then you’ll be no good to Sadie or Audrey when they let you in to see them.”
“I don’t think that’s quite how it works,” Ethan responds.
“Nah, dude, I think she’s right.” I lean across Tenley to tell Ethan.
Ethan laughs. “You’re an idiot.”
I shrug in response. But it’s nice to see him lighten up for just a second.
Then, the doctor approaches.
“How is she?” Ethan jumps up and rushes toward the man.
The doctor pulls off his surgery cap for the second time and holds it in his hands. He looks wiped out. “She lost a lot of blood. We had to give her a transfusion, but both she and the baby are stable. The baby is in NICU for now. I’ll have someone get you when your wife and daughter are ready for visitors.”
“Oh, thank god.” Ethan lets out a huge rush of air, and his shoulders visibly relax with the news. “Thank you, doc.”
The doctor holds up his hand to interrupt Ethan. “I’m afraid a total hysterectomy was necessary to stop the bleeding in your wife. There was nothing else we could do. I’m sorry.” He grabs Ethan by the bicep and gives a small squeeze, then walks away.
“Ethan, I’m so sorry.” Tenley rushes toward him and pulls him into her arms.
He steps back from her. “Why?”
“Well, I mean, the hysterectomy.” Tenley frowns. “It means no more kids, which will break Sadie’s heart. She wants a big family.” Tenley frowns.
Ethan looks at her like she’s crazy. “I don’t care. I don’t care about any of it as long as Sadie is okay.”
“And Audrey,” Tenley adds.
“And Audrey.” Ethan scowls. “Besides, we don’t need any more kids. One and done, right?”
I wonder how accurate that is. I know that before now, Ethan too wanted a big family, or at least two kids. I’m guessing the relief he feels now is because his girls are both stable, but what about when life goes back to normal and they remember they wanted to give Audrey a sibling; what then?
Will he be okay with adoption?
Ethan comes toward me. “Thank you so much for being here, man. I don’t know how I would have gotten through this alone.”
It’s not over yet.
I don’t voice the words I’m thinking. Instead, I give Ethan a hug and tell him I’m happy the girls are okay.
