Page 51 of Arise the Queen
And no matter, she could not shake the nagging sense that there was more to his words than a mere slip of the tongue—how vexing it was that, yet again, it was some stranger who’d revealed her truth. Along with a keen sense of disappointment over another deception, the mere possibility of a sister she’d not known about tugged at her curiosity like a loose thread begging to be unraveled.
Oblivious to her turmoil, Bryn stirred in his sleep, mumbling something incoherent as he turned onto his side, facing Gwendolyn.
Beside her, the fire crackled and popped, flickering like a wild soul, its orange and red hues casting dancing shadows across this face.
But, alas, whilst her childhood friend slept only an arm’s length away from her, she had never felt more alone—impossible to imagine how anyone could feel so isolated surrounded by more than two thousand soldiers, but here she was.
When she and Bryn were younger, they used to steal away for a swim, or simply to enjoy one another’s company amidst the cool shelter of trees on a hot summer day, with their backs against an oak,eatingbilberries and confessing secrets?But it was normally Gwendolyn doing the confessing, and Bryn, only listening.
Nothing had changed. He was still the same.
Tonight, he had returned from the rear of the cavalcade with no word of explanation, only saying he’d tired of Málik’s sore headed mood.
At least they hadthatin common.
As yet, neither Bryn nor Málik even knew that the Druids had dissolved her marriage. This was the greatest of news, and yet, so it seemed, Gwendolyn had no one to share it with.
More unbearable yet was the vacant space at her side—not that Málik would ever disrespect her by choosing Gwendolyn’s pallet under the scrutiny of so many, but she had at least hoped he would make his pallet close by.
Instead, where was he?
Sleeping peacefully more than three kilometers away…
So he’d claimed he wished to be the first to know if they encountered an ambush from behind. But whilst it had seemed a good strategy at the time, Gwendolyn now wondered if there was yet another reason he’d been so intent upon avoiding her.
Did he fear she would ask something he was unprepared to answer?
Her face twisted into a pained expression, her brows furrowing and her mouth pulling tight. How many times must she tell him that a lie of omission was still a lie? Would she discover on the morrow that she was in love with her own brother? Or that Aengus Óg was her real father?
Grimacing over the thoughts, she was at least thankful that she remembered enough about Aengus to know she didnot share his blood. But the point was this: At this moment, anything seemed possible, and, as she lay brooding in the shadows—all alone on her pallet, her mind raced with questions and doubts.
Now this…
Blinking away a new sting of tears, this time for anger, Gwendolyn gazed into the dancing flames, her thoughts drifting again to the afternoon’s conversation with Amergin… Not too long ago, she had bemoaned the lack of family, and now… if that old man and Esme spoke true, her mother was out there somewhere, and a sister, too—for all Gwendolyn knew she might have ten!
The cool night air brushed her skin, sending a shiver down her spine, and she tugged Arachne’s cloak higher about her shoulders, gazing beyond the fire’s light.
Gods.She missed Málik so much it ached—those beautiful blue eyes, those fangs which, despite their daunting appearance, never failed to titillate her… because she knew what pleasure they could provide.
Did he no longer have feelings for her?
Ever since their reunion, he’d been so distant and reserved, and despite that his enigmatic nature had once so much appealed to her, it now filled her with so much uncertainty. This moment, she longed to crack her palm against his too-handsome face, and then to look him in the eyes and demand he speak only truth—all of it—before desperately kissing him.
Mind you, she craved both, but without honesty and truth, the rest was worth too little. At the first opportunity, she would give him a much-deserved tongue lashing—and not the sort he would wish for.
If indeed, he still desired such things.
Willing him to come to her, at least to explain, Gwendolyn tossed and turned, all the while commanding herself to remainabed. It was to everyone’s good fortune that the sin of pride kept her rooted to her pallet.
Sleep came eventually, but with difficulty, and, to Gwendolyn’s dismay, only after envisioning herself snuggled in Málik’s embrace.
25
By twilight of the fourth evening, they had ridden as far north as Gwendolyn had ever dared venture—deep into Brigantes territory.
According to that map in her father’s war room, here they should remain till they reached the Border Esk and the Moorfoot hills. And once there, and they spied Blackhope Scar—the tallest of fourteen hills—they would be halfway to their destination.
Inherited from the Fae who’d once occupied their lands, that map was a representation no mortal could have conceived, much less created. It held the last vestiges of Fae magic and, like the Dragon’s Lair above their city, nobody knew how it worked. As a girl, she had marveled over every dip and swell in the painted clay, imagining herself sovereign over all. A physical depiction of Pretania from Land’s End to the north seas, it was carved to precision and changed as the land changed. Indeed, during her father’s first years as king, when the Great Southern Storm flooded the southern coastlands, razing forests and destroying villages, the map had depicted this change. In fact, the only thing that map did not reveal accurately was the magic hidden at Porth Pool and the truth of the Druid’s Crossroads. Those placeswere veiled even from Gwendolyn’s eyes, and perhaps from her father’s, too. But if not, then at least she now understood why her father had never felt compelled to see the pool for himself. Although it may have been noted if anyone ever attempted to move the map, it was an inseparable part of the chamber in which it was built. If Trevena were ever to be destroyed, that map would also be lost, and that fate nearly came to pass during the exodus of its makers.
