Page 54 of From Duke Till Dawn
“Secret societies often use things like this to gain entrance to their gatherings.” He held it up to the light. “I know I’ve seen this before.” Alex slipped the coin into a pocket inside his coat. “There are some people I can ask.”
“I’ll go with you.”
He shook his head. “Not this time.”
She raised a brow. “You won’t let me out of your sight, but you can stomp off to make inquiries on your own?”
A corner of his mouth turned up in a disarming half smile. “There’s no fairness in life.” He glanced around. “There’s also no need for us to stay around. Unless you’d like to watch the race.”
She didn’t want to run into Lord Keene again, or risk the possibility of encountering another of her marks and having more secrets about herself exposed. “I’ve had enough chases for one day.”
In the carriage heading back to Alex’s home, Cassandra’s attention kept dancing between the passing scenery and watching Alex. He sat in a brooding silence, his hands cupping the head of his walking stick, his chin lowered in thought.
They hadn’t spoken since leaving Hampton. But if she could read him—and she could—he was mulling over the day’s events.
“You didn’t expect to see Hughes at the races,” Alex said, relieving the silence.
She sighed. “Part of me wished he’d be there. The other part...” She rubbed at a spot between her eyebrows. “It makes it all the more real. His running out on me.”
“And when he saw you today, and fled...” Alex frowned. “That made it real, too.”
“I suppose I thought he’d tell me it was all a mistake, that there was a decent explanation for everything.” Her mouth twisted. “You must think me a fool to keep holding on to hope.”
He exhaled. “I think you cared for him. Trusted him. And it’s a hard thing to lose that trust.”
“Speaking from your own experience,” she said wryly.
He shrugged. “It’s different, what happened between you and I.”
“Is it?” she wondered.
He gazed directly into her eyes, and it felt both alarming and exciting. He saw too deeply inside of her, touching places she wanted left alone. “I don’t believe I was the only one with my heart involved.” His eyes, dark and warm, searched her face. “I wish I’d known... that you thought I was different.”
“Does it matter?”
“It does.” He reached across the carriage and ran a finger down her cheek. “I believed I was one of hundreds. Another fat purse to be plucked. But I think... I think I meant something to you.” The tenderness in his gaze made her ache with longing. “And you meant something to me.”
Her heart leapt. “Did I?”
“I’ve been a title, not a man, for so long. You were the only one who believed I was so much more, even when I didn’t see it myself. When I’d learned that you were a swindler, I thought everything had been a lie. I see now, that wasn’t true.” He leaned closer, and she felt overwhelmed by him. “You were far more honest than I knew.”
She’d wanted to hear this from him for so long that it physically hurt to listen to him now. She felt raw and exposed and so full of yearning, she felt herself being torn into pieces.
“I’m sorry,” he said, his words a rasp. He gazed at her, his eyes burning, his features sharp. He’d never looked more handsome, and it devastated her. Need and want filled every part of her.
It was too much. She’d drown in her own desires, her own hopes.
“We’re past apologies,” she managed.
“But that doesn’t mean we don’t need to hear them,” he answered. The distance between them continued to shrink as he leaned closer and she was drawn helplessly toward him. His lips were close. Close enough to kiss.
She turned her head to the side. “Please,” she gasped. “Let us talk of other things. I can’t... I can’t bear this.”
He seemed to understand, and moved back a little, giving her room to breathe. She pressed herself into the upholstered seats as if she could lose herself in the cushioning and find some safety from the temptation he offered.
“Who will you ask about the coin?” she asked after a long while.
“My friends Ellingsworth and Langdon.”
