Page 124 of House of Dusk
To return to a life of burning purity, a gorgeous, ruthless flame that cast all her sins in sharp relief. A brightness that focused her gaze always inward. What had Nilos said, about the balewalkers? That they bore witness to the pain of life. They served the spirits within the Labyrinth.
A lump lodged in her throat. She swallowed it. “And you really think you can handle the other skotoi alone?”
“I have the shepherd’s fragment now,” he said. “It will have to be enough. The others are gone. Consumed by the skotoi.”
“Not all of them.” She held out her arm. The ring was dark against her skin. “We had a deal. You kept your end of the bargain. Now I’ll keep mine.”
He tried to step back, the wall was behind him. “No.”
She watched him. “You’re afraid.”
“Yes. I—” His jaw worked. “Fates, I can feel it.Him. I’m drowning in it, Sephre. It’s so close.”
She could hear the pain, the fear in his voice. Felt an answering echo in her chest. “What...what do you think will happen? Will you—” She forced herself to say it—“Will you die?”
He huffed, giving her a wry look. “Will the Serpent burst out of me like the Phoenix from the flames?” He shook his head. “I don’t think it will be that simple. I’m—he’s part of me. He’s making me him. I’m not even sure how much of me is still Nilos. And I think it will only take a bit more to...tip the balance. And then I’ll be gone.”
Fates. She had feared the storm on the horizon, only to find a scorpion in her hand. Death was hard enough. Death meant rebirth. Meant that sometime, someday, they might meet again.
She took his hand. Still warm. Still strong and human. He smiled, but there was no humor in it. Only a terrible resignation.
“But that’s not the only reason,” he said. One of his fingers traced the veins of her wrist, prickling her skin, sending shivers along every nerve. “You’re a mortal, walking in the labyrinth of the dead. The mark at least offers you some protection. Without it...”
“Don’t worry about me,” she said. “I can take care of myself.”
“I noticed.” He gave her a wistful smile. “I’m sorry we didn’t meet in another time. Another life.”
He raised a hand to her face, his palm smooth and cool against the flame of her cheek. There was a fire in her that had nothing holy about it. And a desperation. It could not end like this. She would not allow it.
“I’ll remember you.” Her voice wanted to crack, but she held it firm. “Even if you change. Even if you forget who Nilos is, I won’t.”
“Thank you,” he said, and the simple words nearly broke her. There was nothing she could say. Nothing she could give him except the one thing that she had been so desperate to be rid of. The thing that might destroy a man that she . . .lovedwasn’t the right word. She had known him only a few days. And yet it felt like a lifetime.
So she gave him something else. A gift to herself as much as to him, if she was being completely honest. One memory, one moment, of what might have been. She had spent the last ten years wanting to forget. Now, all she wanted was to remember this, forever.
She kissed him.
He went still in surprise at first, which charmed her. Then he was moving, lips parting, hand sliding back to the nape of her neck, pulling her closer. Sweetness melted through her, and she was suddenly very aware that her body was a living thing. A hungry thing.
It was only a single kiss. But it was a kiss to last a lifetime.
Deep inside, she felt something tugging. A deep-buried splinter pulling free. She felt his sharp gasp, the air sliding over her own mouth. A part of her cried out in protest, but it was too late. She scrabbled to keep hold of Nilos, her fingers lacing through his, tangled tight to the hand that had carved a toy horse, sliced a fig, tended her wounds.
But the hand was gone. The man was gone. All she felt beneath her fingers were cold, smooth scales.
CHAPTER 34
SEPHRE
Sephre’s knees cracked against the stones. She looked up, shivering, and felt as if the entire universe had somehow bound itself into those two green eyes. Utterly numinous, they loomed over her like the night sky, vast and timeless and cold.
He was beautiful, and terrible. Coils of shimmering darkness, glinting with a sheen of starlight. They wove and twisted endlessly, the patterns absorbing her mind, almost dragging her into a daze. She could not take his measure. He seemed to fill all the available space. To surround her, and encompass her.
She could only breathe, and blink, and tremble. It wasn’t fear. Fear she knew. Fear she could overcome. This was something else. Awe? Reverence?
Or possibly her weary brain had simply given up, unable to fathom the fact that this was the god of dusk, the embodiment of death, right here in front of her. And she had kissed him. Well, not him. The human he had been.
“Nilos?” She finally managed to shape his name, though it came out a whisper. Did he recognize her at all? Did he remember?
