Page 38 of The Heir
Another heartbeat. Another decision. A flicker of power and possibility warming a place in her that had been cold for so long.
“Jane?” She did not look up to see his frown deepening, but she heard it clearly as he spoke her name. “What did you say to her?”
“You’ll be angry,” she whispered.
“I will be angrier if you do not answer me.”
Jane regarded her father, aware of a shriveling misery inside her.What am I doing? He’ll know I am not telling him everything, that I’m burying the lie inside the truths. He’ll see it instantly.
“I said I would help.”
“You did?”
Jane made herself nod the same way she had made herself smile.
Father laughed. It was a long, full-throated sound. It was real. Jane’s heart and breath stopped entirely.
“Oh, Jane! You clever girl!” Father beamed, and his smile was as genuine as his laugh. “It’s perfect! It’s a game of ‘Let’s pretend,’ and it will keep her distracted and out of trouble. And, when the time is right, I will be able to tell the board and . . . others . . . what silliness she’s been engaged in and how my dutiful daughter has been trying so hard to keep her distractions from showing. Yes, Jane.” He reached over and patted her hand. “You’ve done very well.”
“I . . . I’m trying, Father.”
“You’re succeeding.” He beamed. “And that means we will all succeed.”
How was it possible she was doing this? She was telling the truth and yet somehow transforming that truth into a complete lie. And Father believed. He believed, and he laughed.
“What is it now, Jane? There’s something you are not saying.”
Jane’s mind suddenly felt very crowded. She heard the princess saying,What was Dr. Maton’s full connection to Sir John?
Don’t risk it. He’ll know.That voice gibbered.He’ll know. He’llknowhe’llknowhe’llknowhe’llknow!
“We heard today that Dr. Maton is dead.”
“Yes. I heard that, as well.” Father’s voice was bland, dismissive. “What of it?”
The only question that remains, said the princess from memory,the only lie that remains, is that the dead man was Dr. Maton . . . Why didn’t Sir John want anyone to know itwashim?
“I only thought . . .”
“What did you think?” Father’s habitual cold was creeping back into his voice. Jane knotted her fingers together.
“I thought you were friends with him. He’s been to dinner. . .” A twist of guilt seized her. This was something she had not said to the princess. Father frequently hosted dinners for the men of the Kensington board and other people in the princess’s household who could be useful to them. Dr. Maton had been among them.
All the goodwill she’d gained from Father drained away. She felt it as clearly as if it was water running from her cupped hands.
“Dr. Maton did his duty as a physician in the medical household,” he said. “And yes, he came to dine with us, along with other members of the Kensington board, all of whom are responsible for the princess’s welfare. You didn’t say that to the princess, did you?”
“No, Father.”But why shouldn’t I? She knows you talk to the men of the board.
“Who dines with us is of no concern to her, you understand that?”
“Yes, Father,” whispered Jane.
He reached out and patted her hand. “Good girl.”
He was not watching when Jane curled her hand into a fist.
Chapter 17
