Page 28 of The Captain's Midwinter Bride
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His palms felt clammy, and a drop of sweat ran down his spine.
Phillip did not want to muck this up. For the first time, Beth was sharing her troubles with him. She was receptive to his suggestions and observations. He was actually parenting after a very long absence from the job.
And while he worried over every word, Annalise sat serenely by, the precise words and advice Beth needed to hear ready to fall from her tongue at a moment’s notice. She made this parenting business look effortless, but he knew it had been anything but. He had the advantage of having Annalise by his side as he helped Beth through her heartache, but who had been by his wife’s side, helping her, with the painful realities of parenthood while he was gone at sea?
No one. The enormity of that realization had him sit back in his chair. It was easy to rationalize all that Annalise had done as a single mother with an absent husband, but it was quite another to experience firsthand what a feat it was.
Lord, but he yearned to keep her. Wished anew that she would accompany him to Wales and live by his side. But seeing her with the children, seeing how beloved she was by the Pellinghams, all of their neighbors, had reminded him that her roots in Bristol were deep. For while he was sailing off to foreign shores, her friends were the ones she turned to when the trials of being a single parent became more difficult than she could bear. When he departed for Wales, he would long for her sunny smiles and easy laugh. And after the passionate night they had spent together, Phillip would miss her touch. The sweet taste of her lips. The low moans she made when she came apart in his arms. His nights and days would be lonely, but he didn’t dare ask her for more than she’d already given him.
But now was not the time to concern himself with his future plans. Instead, he needed to aid Beth in realizing what a bounder Silas Newell was.
Annalise shifted, and he turned his gaze to her only to find her gesturing with her chin towards Beth. The girl had said something, and he had not responded. He needed to fix that.
Mentally chewing over her words, Phillip decided his best course of action was to be honest. “That is definitely a risk you will have to take. Loving someone is taking a risk that they won’t love you in return.”
Rising from his seat, he crouched down before her and met Beth’s gaze head on. “If Mr. Ramsgate has decided he does not want you, that does not meanyouare wanting in any way. You are an intelligent, bold, and exceedingly lovely young woman who is worthy of all good things. If Mr. Ramsgate cannot see that, he’s a simpleton. And rejection does not mean thateveryyoung man you esteem will reject you, poppet. It also doesn’t mean you should yolk yourself to a man you do not love simply because you believe you cannot do any better.”
Beth gasped, clutching her hands over her mouth. “Do you think that’s why I agreed to Mr. Newell’s suit? Simply because he wanted me?”
Phillip shook his head. “Only you can answer that question.”
Worrying her lip, Beth stared at the floor for a long, tense moment. “I think…that is, I’m certain I do not want to marry Silas.”
Jerking his head back, Phillip stared at Beth before darting his gaze to Annalise. She stared back at him with a relieved smile. He barely restrained himself from whooping in delight.
“If it’s not too much trouble, of course.” Beth winced, looking first at her mother and then at him. “I know you spent a great deal of money for the wedding and my trousseau—”
“Hush now, darling.” Annalise patted her back. “Your father and I will handle the details of canceling the arrangements. They are inconsequential in comparison to your future happiness.”
Beth’s dark eyes, so much like her mother’s, filled with tears. “Thank you. I suppose I thought after Henry Ramsgate that Silas would be the only man that would ever want me.”
“You’re young, my dear. So very young.” Swallowing, Phillip finally took the chance and brushed his knuckles over her cheek. “I promise that there is ample time for you to meet an estimable young man who is deserving of you, and until that time comes, do not feel you have to settle.”
“And marrying Mr. Newell would have been settling because your heart is engaged elsewhere.” Annalise hugged their girl to her side. “Marriages of convenience have their place, but if you can marry for love, never settle.”
Not like she had.Annalise had not said the words, yet Phillip heard them just the same. He met his wife’s gaze, his heart thudding loudly in his ears. Would he ever feel deserving of her? He suspected that if she accompanied him to Wales, she’d simply be settling once again. Acquiescing to the man she thought saved her from ruin, even whilst his family robbed her of her inheritance. He would not let that happen. Annalise was finally in a position to dictate the course of her future, and he was not going to stand in her way.
Even if it hurt like hell when she chose a future without him.
Chapter Eight
“Mr. Newell and his mother have come to collect Miss Dalton for a ride, ma’am.”
Annalise jerked her head up from the letters she had been writing to various wedding vendors, canceling their orders, and blinked for a long moment at the manservant, Brandon. When the full meaning of the man’s words came to her, she looked to Phillip, who sat in the armchair nearby reading the newspaper. His expression darkened for only a moment, then he folded the paper and laid it on the table next to him.
“Please tell the Newells we’ll join them in the parlor instead. Thank you, Brandon.”
Rising to his feet with easy grace, he plucked the pen from her hand and tossed it onto the table. Extending a hand, he flashed a quick smile. “Let us collect Beth and end this engagement once and for all.”
Swallowing, Annalise nodded. “They’re not going to take the news well.”
Folding her arm over his, he dipped his head to whisper in her ear. “I honestly don’t give a damn.”
The feel of his breath coasting over her sensitive skin sent a thread of desire skipping down her spine. Just that morning, he had done wicked things to her with his sinful mouth, and her body yearned to experience those things again. Her mind flashed through all the possibilities until Phillip’s dark chuckle brought her up short.
“Now is not the time for such thoughts, Mrs. Dalton. We have important business to see to.” Leaning down, he nipped at her earlobe. “But perhaps after we have rid ourselves of our guests, we can take a lovely afternoon nap together. I find the thought very bracing.”
