Page 57 of Such a Good Couple
‘Seb?’ Hugo swivelled his head in a move reminiscent of a lizard. His whole vibe was a bit lizardy, now that Clara thought about it.
‘Ah, only two.’ Seb flashed that grin that used to beam down at Clara from the posters on her teenage bedroom wall. He carried on: ‘But what I save in alimony I more than make up for in shelling out child support.’ He laughed wryly, shaking his head. ‘Seven kids total, plus one son still with pat test pending.’
‘Paternity test?’ Fionn asked, not very successfully hiding his disbelief.
‘Ah, yeah.’ Seb Wade waved a hand vaguely, then took the bottle of Buckfast from Saint and proceeded to examine the label with far greater interest than he’d just displayed when talking about his potential eighth child.
‘You’re all so lucky,’ Clara chirped. ‘I can’t even afford onedivorce, never mind multiple.’
‘You tryna get a divorce, honey?’ Saint took out a small weed pen and took a pensive pull.
‘It’s looking that way.’ Clara glanced over at Fionn, who seemed uncomfortable. She wondered what Ollie was saying in their group chat. She relieved Seb of the Buckfast and took a swig, before continuing, ‘Today we did counselling and it was not good.’ She looked at the other men. ‘Any of you ever do the try-to-make-it-work thing?’
‘No,’ said Hugo promptly. ‘Very boring, I’d imagine.’
‘Hmmmmm.’ Clara nodded. ‘Yeah, it’s not really my scene either. But we’re pretty stuck on all fronts – money-wise, house-wise, kids-wise.’
‘But it’s you and Ollie, you guys love each other.’ Fionn looked pained and, while it washerbleak life causing this look, it did make her appreciate that he was still his old self in many ways. Conor had always been the smart one and Ollie was the goof of the group but Fionn had a gentleness to him. He had a lot of empathy. She supposed all artists did – you needed it to make art. It was why he was good at creating characters and portraying their stories. Obviously, like all men, he had his lapses – like ditching them on their holiday. But at least success hadn’t made him a dead-eyed cynic like these reptilian men.
‘You know who you should talk to …’ Seb straightened up suddenly. ‘What was that guy’s name again?’ He started clicking his fingers.
‘Oh yeah!’ Saint piped up from his nearly prone position. ‘The producer guy. Reality TV guy.’
‘Simon,’ Fionn said quietly, to cheers from the others.
‘Yeah, man. That’s the one.’
Fionn turned to Clara. ‘Ignore them, don’t talk to Simon. He’s doing this thing but it’s really seedy and it’s … just … a big bowl of wrong.’ He leaned closer to her. ‘I know Ollie is reallyupset right now. To be honest, I think maybe heisoverreacting a bit, which I’ve said to him. That didn’t go down well …’ Fionn shrugged helplessly. ‘And, like, I know he’s talking about walking away and that’s—’
‘Wait, he’s said that to you?’ Clara gripped the neck of the bottle tighter.
‘He’s just very—’
‘Look!’ Seb interrupted them. ‘There he is, that producer dude!’ Seb waved over towards a small, muscular, bald man with an all-over bronze tan showcased by the shimmering gold tank top he wore over matching loose shimmering harem pants. ‘Simon,’ Seb yelled. This caught the guy’s attention and he sloped towards them, entirely unhurried as he crossed the room accepting slightly sycophantic greetings from some of the Irish reality stars in the vicinity.
‘Hello again, fellas.’ Simon leaned on the back of Seb Wade’s sofa. ‘What can I do for you?’
‘It’s for her.’ Saint exhaled a plume of smoke in Clara’s direction.
‘She’s in the market for a divoooo-rrrr-ce,’ Hugo Thomas sang cheerily and, through her booze haze, Clara felt a wriggle of disgust. The way these men talked … clearly no one had been anything less than entirely deferential to them in years and it showed. How did Maggie tolerate these people on the regular?
The producer, Simon, looked down at her and leaned forward to extend a hand. ‘I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through a tough time. I’m Simon Hayes.’
‘Clara … eh … Delaney. For now, at least.’
‘Clara,’ Fionn interjected, ‘it will all settle down, I know it will.’
‘You weren’t in our session today,’ Clara shot back.
‘Session? You’re in couples counselling?’ Simon gazed down with sympathy.
‘First appointment today. And probably the last. Fucker charges a fortune and Ollie – that’s my husband – stormed out early anyway. And it washisidea.’
‘It’s a very challenging time.’ Simon nodded.
‘Yeah.’ Clara brought the Buckfast up for a swig. ‘So. Why were these guys saying I should talk to you? You’re a producer?’
‘I’m doing a reality show for couples who are finding themselves in difficulty in their relationships. We’re casting in the next few weeks to start shooting in just over a month. It’s a short shoot – just three weeks – but the location is stunning. The Greek islands. Still gorgeous in September at that time. ThinkLove IslandmeetsWife Swap.’
