Page 68 of Such a Good Couple
Annie didn’t look at her. ‘It’s okay, you don’t have to say it.’
‘I actually think I do, to be honest.’
Annie looked up, to see Rachel beaming with a mixture of utter joy and slight disbelief.
‘You’re pregnant.’
The world tilted then and Annie gripped the table.
‘Shut up.’ Her voice came out strangled as Rachel rushed forward to hug her.
‘Annie!’ Rachel squealed. ‘It’s happening.’
‘Shut up,’ Annie repeated, as Rachel’s coconut-scented hair trailed over her face.
‘I won’t shut up! I’m so happy.’ Rachel was crying, and then Annie realised she was too.
They pulled apart and looked at each other. Rachel held Annie’s face and gently thumbed the tears from her cheeks, only for more to immediately fall. It was a strange sensation; she wasn’t actually crying but tears were spilling out. It was like a new expression of happiness. As though the joy building inside her had to come out in some form or another. She began to laugh – a high-pitched, disbelieving laugh. She stood up and then sat down again and then stood again.
‘I don’t know what I’m doing.’ She giggled, the tears continuing to stream. Through the blur she picked up the test to read the word ‘pregnant’. She read it again and again.
‘This doesn’t feel real.’
‘It’s real, Annie.’ Rachel squeezed Annie’s hand. ‘And it’s wonderful.’
An hour later, Annie lay upstairs in her room. There was only so much time two people could spend at a kitchen table joyfully saying ‘what the fuck’ at each other. And so, she’d gone to bed, to be alone and to try and let the news sink in.
In other words, overthink in peace.
Her thoughts pinballed between exhilarating delight and paralysing anxiety. The anxiety was particularly baffling.I’vewanted this for so long. Why is my bitch brain now trying to scare me out of being happy?
Of course, she’d wanted it with Conor. She’d wanted it in their old life. She’d pictured this day intheirhome and had imagined having a baby intheirfuture, the one that they’d been building towards.
Being pregnant when she’d just been cast adrift, alone for the first time since she was twenty and with no clear idea of what the next years may hold, was scary.
Then another gust of incredulous joy took her.But I am pregnant. I’m going to have a baby.
She placed her hands on her stomach, trying to imagine having a bump in a few months’ time, and she felt almost narcotically high and happy.
She took a deep breath.I can do this. I have a good job. I’ll have Clara and Rachel close by and my family will do everything they can to help. I won’t be alone. This is happening.
She squeezed her eyes shut and allowed all the hope that she’d been tamping down for nearly two years to swell and envelop her.
This is happening. It’s just not how I thought it would look.
She thought of Conor.
This was happening, but it wouldn’t be without its complications.
CHAPTER 17
The journey to Kos was eight hours of pure hell, what with five acrimonious couples and nine kids of varying ages and levels of annoying. Clara was extremely grateful it was over.
On the plane, Clara had tried to get a read on the competition. There was Liz and Paul – both in their early forties as well – with two kids in tow. Darina and Richie were late thirties and had no children. Rob and Sean were with their toddler, Viva, and lastly, Mary and Derek who were the youngest – both in their early thirties – with three kids.
There was a fairly clear dynamic among all the couples. One partner who was buzzing to bring their shitshow life to the masses and one partner who was here under duress, though evidently had been sold on the idea that this was a route to getting free from their head-wrecking partner once and for all.
On the disappointingly rundown compound, there were villas and two swimming pools but the place had clearly had its heyday twenty years before.Not unlike ourselves, she’d thought grimly.
