Page 123 of The Highlander Who Loved Me
His words were blunt and so utterly unexpected, Johanna’s knees went to jelly. She dragged in a breath to steady herself and slowly released it. “It’s all rather pointless now. After tonight, an ocean will separate us.” She swallowed against the sudden burn in the back of her throat. “You never even said farewell.”
“That is a fact, Johanna. I’ve no intention of saying farewell. I’ve no intention of seeing ye leave me again.”
“In that case, you will be disappointed.” My, how the words burned on her tongue. “Your timing is rather poor. I’ve already made arrangements.”
“I am well aware of your arrangements. Why do ye think I am here today?”
Johanna turned toward the door, but he barred it with his sturdy arm. She hiked her chin in defiance. If he thought to control her, he’d discover he was quite mistaken. If only the fire in his eyes did not threaten to melt her defenses. “So, it seems I’ve been taken in by a ruse. Not a very clever one, at that.”
“A ruse?” He seemed genuinely perplexed.
“The visit from Serena. Her request for assistance… I suppose that was merely an act.”
“Nay, my sister has every intention of sailing across the Atlantic. I’d be grateful if ye would take her under yer wing. The lass possesses a head full of facts, knowledge of chemicals and sleuthing and ancient texts, none of which has prepared her for what lies ahead in the city—much less a city in blasted America.”
“How did you know I would be here?”
Arrogance lit his smiling eyes. “I have contacts in many places. Ye should know that by now. London is teeming with them. Some are MacMasters’ clan. Others have earned our trust.”
“But why? Why do you care if I leave?” She gulped against the blasted lump in her throat. “Even if we had one more night together…”
He gathered her in his arms. The brush of his lips over her forehead was tender and passionate and sweet. “If I have my way, we’ll spend a lifetime of nights together.”
“A lifetime?” She pressed her palms to his chest, creating a whisper of space between their bodies, forcing herself to think with her head and not her heart.
“I want ye with me for the rest of my days, Johanna.”
“This is so very sudden.” And oh, so very wonderful. Save for the truth that pierced her soul.
His earnest plea touched her heart. But he’d not mentioned love. Only want. That wasn’t enough. She needed more than passionate nights. She needed a man who’d crave the feel of her at his side when she was old and wrinkled and her bones creaked like Marley’s ghost rattling its chains.
Doubt pierced her, a throbbing misery deep in her soul. How desperately she wanted him. But how could she surrender her heart to him? She’d known him for such a very short time, in a time of great danger and even greater emotion. How could she trust Connor with that most vulnerable part of her? If he betrayed her, the tattered remnants of her heart might never mend.
And what of Laurel? She couldn’t keep the child from the family who loved her. And the merest thought of leaving the girl behind in America while she returned to the Highlands with Connor tore at her like a thousand tiny daggers.
Connor wanted her. But that wasn’t enough. And it never would be.
“This is all so very unexpected,” she said, little more than an anguished whisper.
“Aye, and so it was when I first laid eyes on ye. The need to keep ye safe, the need to make ye mine. Sometimes, fate offers us a gift we’d never foreseen.”
A gift we’d never foreseen.So much for his assertion that he had no talent for sweet sentiments. Not that he needed words when passion blazed in his unforgettable eyes. She took a step back, needing to put distance between them if she were to remain strong.
“Marry me, Johanna. We’ll have a grand life together.” He dipped his head and claimed her lips, the most delicious of kisses.
His caress conjured a sultry fog, engulfing them. She could scarcely think, yet alone reason, when every cell in her body longed for him. But there was no choice. Allowing him to sweep her away was a delicious prospect. But she had to protect her heart from its own foolish yearnings.
“I am so very sorry, Connor.” Pulling away from his embrace, she rushed to the door. “My answer is no.”
…
Thesnickof the door as it closed behind Johanna reverberated in Connor’s ears like a gunshot. A sense of disbelief descended over him as he watched her bolt from his arms and hurry from the room. She’d closed the portal quietly behind her, taking care to avoid making a scene even as she fled his presence.
Reality slammed into Connor, a brutal punch he hadn’t been able to duck. He hadn’t thought she’d leave him. Bluidy hell, he hadn’t anticipatedthis.
Dazed by the pain coursing through his veins, he made his way to the courtyard and stared into the night. He was alone.
As he deserved to be.
