Page 23 of My Cowboy Boss
Halfway home, the doubts throw themselves at me. And the guilt that was once a small seed has grown into a forest now.
I’m flushed as I walk into the apartment. Riddled with what I should have said and shouldn’t have done to and with Flint.
My sister, who can read me like a book, straightens up instantly from where she’s relaxing on the couch. “What is it?”
“I fucked up so bad.”
“We can fix it. Just tell me.”
“I slept with my boss. I mean your boss. I love him. I didn’t know I loved him, but I do and I’m so sorry.” I sob into my hands. “When I tell him the truth, he’ll fire me. I mean you. Us. Whatever.”
“Oh, Sis.” Aspen pulls me into a hug and pats my back the way she used to do when I was younger. “It’s okay. I’ll find something else.”
“What should I do?” I lift my head. “I can’t lie to him about this anymore and I don’t want to. I don’t want him to be hurt. I can’t believe I talked you into this situation and now he’ll be hurt and you’ll be hurt and me, too.” I press my hand against my stomach. “I feel so nauseated by everything.”
“That’s because you’re a good person and you want to do the right thing.”
“I do.” I grab a tissue to wipe my nose.
“You have to tell him the truth and if he does choose to fire you, at least it’ll be a clean break. Do you need me there?”
“No. I’m the one that created this mess so I’m the one who should handle it.”
“But if he gets angry—”
“He might but Flint isn’t mean. The worst he’ll do is tell me to leave the ranch.” That thought fills me with desolation. How could I not have known I’d fallen for my boss? No wonder I felt so thrilled whenever he was around.
“You need to keep your energy up. I bought an extra salad while I was out today and put it in the refrigerator for you,” Aspen says.
I’m afraid if I eat something it’ll only taste like sawdust but my sister looks worried so I put half of the food on a plate and quickly eat it.
The rest of the day drags on and turns into night. Sunday is the same.
I go to bed but toss and turn, unable to sleep except in short fits. I jolt awake repeatedly from dreams of Flint. In them, after I tell him how I lied, he turns his back to me and walks away. No matter how loudly I call his name or how long I chase him, I can’t reach him.
By the time Monday morning dawns, I’m an exhausted mess.
Foregoing wearing my sister’s usual attire, I dress in a pair of jeans and a nice shirt, then get my sneakers from where I’d left them. I’m leaving earlier than I normally do because I want to stop in town and get something sweet from Dough Corner for Flint and his brothers.
I guess I want something good to come from my final goodbye.
After I buy a large order of cinnamon rolls, the drive to the ranch is over much too fast. When I pull into the driveway, Flint bounds down the porch steps, smiling and so handsome that I feel a physical pain in my heart.
Grabbing the bag of treats, I step out of the car and walk toward him knowing this is the beginning of the end.
Chapter 10
Flint
How is it possible that Arizona grew even more beautiful since I last saw her? I hurry off the porch toward her, tired but happy. I haven’t been back at the ranch long. I got up early this morning to create a surprise for her. One I’m hoping she’ll be thrilled about.
I think she will but I’m not a hundred percent sure and the part of me that’s unsure is nervous.
“You brought cinnamon rolls?” I ask, inhaling the tempting aroma.
“Enough for everyone.” She holds out the bag and smiles but it’s not a real one.
I take the bag and she says, “I need to talk to you.”
