Page 68 of Mr. Aster
“It is beautiful,” she answered, taking a lounge chair to my right. “Look at that moon,” she said, looking out where the orange moon sat just beyond the ocean’s horizon.
I smiled. “My wife was obsessed with the moon no matter what phase it was in,” I said. “She would find this particular moon fascinating, I’m sure.”
It really was beautiful, and as the memory of my wife flooded back to me, I felt like I wanted to share a little about Melissa with Darcy. My emotions felt raw and wide open right now, and because I was appreciative of Darcy joining me, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to be a little vulnerable.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Darcy
Itook a sip of tea, not too upset by the events that’d occurred since Sebastian woke me during his dream, saying Melissa’s name over and over with agony in his voice. It was heartbreaking, and as much as I didn’t want to wake him up, it’d reached a point where I couldn’t bear to hear his anguish anymore.
His inability to use a tea kettle was a much more annoying wake-up call than his dream, but ultimately, I felt more pity for him than upset. I never would’ve imagined the rigid man had a weak or soft spot, but the wee morning hours showed me a different side.
“So, I think it’s obvious you’re still getting through the hard parts of grieving your wife’s loss, but I think it’s good and very healthy that you’re willing to talk about her, especially with me,” I finally spoke after watching him studiously pull his tea bag in and out of his mug.
“It’s not just you. I don’t like speaking of her passing to anyone. It’s as if I mentally just shut down.”
“A very understandable defense mechanism,” I answered, completely relaxed and prepared at any moment for him to shut down again.
“Well, if I’d allowed you to meet my parents, you’d understand why I’m not in touch with my emotions. I’m just not the kind of guy who talks about things like that.”
“Well, you don’t have to,” I reassured him. “You get no pressure from me. We can discuss anything else, like dinner tonight with Spence and Nat or the delicious fish tacos.”
“The fish tacos were certainly impressive,” he smiled at me.
“But it’s healthy to talk it out, you know that, right? Just to get the poison from all the pain and any negative emotions you’re feeling about her loss out of your system. I say this only because if youdoever want to start dating again, you need to have a more agreeable personality, or you’re just plain fucked.”
He chuckled, “The women I’d be dating don’t give a shit about my personality. They care about my wallet, not me.”
“That’s horribly sad,” I admitted. “Almost as sad as you considering dating someone like that, knowing that’s how they are.”
“Dating?” he looked over at me with a funny smile. “I married the woman who wrote the handbook on how to date for money and status.”
My eyes widened, “How long were you two in a loveless marriage, then? Because trust me, there is no love when money takes precedence.”
“You mean to tell me you wouldn’t love me for my money? You’d love me forme?” He raised his eyebrows as if he couldn’t believe anyone would do such a thing.
I laughed, taking another sip of tea and shaking my head, “To keep facts straight, I wouldn’t dateyoufor your moneyoryou foryou.”
“Well, that sucks.”
“What, being rejected?” I grinned at his sad little boy expression. “If it helps, you’re just not my type. Like we agreed a while ago, we’re from two separate worlds, and if those worlds ever collided, I’d imagine it would make a nuclear bomb look like a firecracker.”
He chuckled, “Very true.”
“I just can’t understand how you could be happy in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love you. Who gives a shit about money? It comes and goes.”
“Well, it’s fairly permanent in my family,” he shrugged and laughed. He had a point. His family fortune had survived world wars, civil wars, and revolutions near and far, and it showed no signs of decreasing within the next millennium.
“Well, being with someone just for money sounds awful to me,” I said, even though he probably couldn’t understand where I was coming from.
“In Melissa’s defense, I didn’t truly love herfor hereither in the beginning. Don’t get me wrong, she was an extremely attractive woman and very agreeable in the public eye, but she also came from an excellent family, and that was the thing that mattered.”
“What eventually drew you to her, if you don’t mind my asking? I don’t want you to shut down, so tell me now if you’re uncomfortable.”
“I’m fine,” he sat back in his chair and crossed his ankles, resting his tea in his lap. “What drew me to her?”
I watched as he studied his tea for answers as if I’d asked the most complicated question on the planet.
