Page 111 of Dr. Stone
“Sooo?” I mirrored her response with a laugh, feeling much lighter after speaking with these wonderful women.
“You have the next two weeks off,” Ash said with her usual cheerfulness, “so you need to talk to your mom and dad about babysitting Brandon for that amount of time. If they can’t do it, my dad and Carmen have already agreed to since they adore that boy.”
“For what? Why?” My hopes were starting to lift, hoping by some miracle that maybe everything was fixed.
“Well,” Darcy said cutely, “I’m sure you’re aware that mine and Seb’s wedding is two weeks. Not only are you invited to it, but Seb, being the adorable man he is these days, has his yacht crew scheduled to host a bachelorette party for me on it.” She smiled at me, “I want you to join us if you’re up to getting the hell out of this bullshit for a couple of weeks?”
I placed a hand over my heart at the generous offer, something I honestly didn’t expect from someone I wasn’t even that close to. “I don’t know how to thank you for such kindness, but…”
And there it was again—the guilt. Leaving my son. Acting like I didn’t have an ex-psycho hell-bent on ruining the man I loved while smearing me for dating Jace and Titus. It all crashed in at once, and suddenly I felt like that shitty, unreliable mom again. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea for me to be gone that long, especially with all the crap he’s already piled on my plate.”
Ash cocked her head, eyes narrowing like she’d been waiting for me to say that. “Do you think we’re bad moms because we leave our kids sometimes?”
The words punched straight through my chest. “What? No. Of course not.” My throat went tight. “I’d never think that about you. You’re amazing mothers. I just…” I blew out a shaky breath. “I feel guilty. Like if I step away for even a second, I’m failing him.”
Ash softened, but her voice was firm. “Then stop treating yourself differently than you’d treat us. That guilt you’re drowning in? That’s not your voice—it’s his. Jonathan planted it there. He wanted you to believe you’re failing, because that’s the easiest way to control you.”
“You’re a fabulous mother,” she added, leaning forward. “I see it in every sacrifice you make for your son. Don’t let him steal that from you.”
“You’re allowed to live a little,” Avery said gently. Then her lips quirked and she looked at Darcy. “Even if it means going to a lavish bachelorette party on a superyacht before attending a wedding in Croatia. You’re one hell of a spoiled little bitch, you know that?”
Darcy rolled her eyes. “Tell me about it,” she said, then smiled at me. “And let me tell you that this man, Mr. Sebastian Aster V, was more than I wanted or needed when I met him. We had a hell of a journey to figure out that we couldn’t live without each other, and an even longer journey to finally set a fucking wedding date.” She reached for my hand, “What made the journey so long and tiresome—and almost the reason none of this was going to happen in two weeks—was that we both did exactly what you’re doing now.”
“Beating yourselves up every time something good comes your way, feeling like you’re wrong for embracing it?” I laughed dryly.
“Exactly that,” she said. “Both of us nearly ruined what was destined for us because we chose to believe we didn’t deserve happiness. And knowing how close I came to missing out on the best thing in my life tears me up. We wasted valuable time being stubborn and stuck in our ways.”
“You’re doing the same thing,” Ash said, while the girls nodded and stared at me with sympathy. “You’re telling yourself you don’t deserve to live a happy life, whether it’s playing with a beach ball on the shore or going to a bachelorette party on a six-hundred-million-dollar yacht. It’s not about how lavish it is or what it costs. You’re holding yourself back because deep down, you don’t believe you deserve it.”
“I know, it’s just?—”
“Allow me to add something here,” Nat said. “That piece of shit reinforced all those negative thoughts with the garbage he spewed in his ridiculous threats. So now, those shitty, untruebeliefs, coming from an insecure man-child, are riding shotgun in your mind.”
“I guess,” I answered.
“I know they are. I can see the guilt all over your goddess of a face,” Nat said. “So, here’s how I want you to accept this invitation, which your boss,” she nodded at Ash, then back at me, “is shutting down her gallery to attend. You don’t need an excuse or a rationalization. You deserve this, and anyone who dares to judge you is just jealous they can’t go too.” She leaned in slightly. “We only get so much time on this damn planet, my darling. So why the hell would you throw away something amazing just because you’re scared that living your life and being happy somehow makes you a bad person?”
I exhaled and pinched the bridge of my nose. “I know where you’re coming from. I really do understand.”
“Good,” Nat said. “Guilt is for suckers and Catholic grandmothers.”
“If you can’t believe that you deserve the best this life has to offer,” Darcy said, “you’ll lose everything great that is placed in front of you, so don’t waste it.”
I exhaled and nodded. “Two weeks in Croatia?” I forced myself to get out of this pitiful mentality. I’d been drowning in the shallow end of the victim pool for so long that I was seriously starting to annoy myself, so it was time I put both feet on the ground and stand up.
“The men are joining us after we have a week to ourselves on the yacht,” Darcy said. “And trust me, I know this is over the top, but what the hell? The man that fate chose for me happens to have more money than an oil sheikh and relishes this over-the-top extravagance. So,” she took a sip of champagne, offered a cute shrug, and smiled, “I plan to enjoy the hell out of it and not care what anyone has to say about me or my guy.”
I shook my head and smiled at the girls, “I’m so grateful to have friends like you.”
“You’d better believe it, too,” Nat said. “Now, you’re joining us on the Aster’s private jet tomorrow night. Mark my words, honey. You’re going to be just fine.”
FORTY-NINE
Jace
Since the dayI met Collin and Jake on my boat, I’d been working angles—Jim at the hospital board to shut down any dirt, Titus for leverage on Jonathan. He was foolish enough to insult Hawk and stupid enough to threaten Andie. Now it was just a waiting game until the call came.
So when Seb hit me up leaving work, I didn’t hesitate to join the guys at his place.
