Page 68 of Not Moving Out
‘I don’t know,’ I finally said, after thinking about my answer for a minute or more.
‘Just remember, Joe, that sometimes life can often feel like it’s either/or. It’s either this or that, but often, if we spend a little time thinking about it, there’s another option staring us in the face.’
‘What would that be?’ I asked hopefully, and she looked at me and smiled.
‘That isn’t for me to say, Joe.’
We sat and talked for another thirty minutes before our time was up, and it felt good to just chat to her about everything. She didn’t always offer up actual solutions to problems because her thing was that we talked, opened up our feelings, and from that discussion solutions would emerge or at least ideas. She had explained to me once that therapy was like planting a tree. You started with a seed, you watered it, gave it time, let the seasons pass, and eventually with some patience, it would grow. When she had first said that, I had brushed it off as wishy-washy nonsense, but I finally understood what she meant.
‘You look nice today. Going somewhere?’ I said as I stood up to leave.
She smiled at me. ‘Thank you, but you know I can’t discuss that.’
‘Just testing the water.’
‘See you next time, Joe,’ replied Karen, and then I left, walking outside and readying myself to meet Dolly for lunch.
It was a gorgeous August day with a royal-blue sky, and it felt like one of those perfect summer days when living by the beach really paid off, and I would miss it if I moved back to London. The beach itself was packed with tourists, especially by the pier, and every fish and chip shop would be busy with punters desperate for some classic seaside grub while trying to fight off the notorious Brighton seagulls, who would happily snatch food right from your hand. I was meeting Dolly in a cafe near her language school, and I was dreading it. I had already ruined my relationship with Freya, and I couldn’t stand the thought of losing Dolly, too. As far as I knew, Freya hadn’t told Dolly aboutHouse Shared, and she knew nothing about our argument.
I found a table and sat down, perusing the menu while I waited for Dolly to arrive. It was a lovely new cafe that had popped up just before summer, and they had a wonderful range of sandwiches, plus great coffee. I had popped in a week ago and had been impressed with my flat white, and so when I asked Dolly to meet for lunch, I had suggested it. I waited for about ten minutes, until Dolly finally came bounding into the cafe, apologising for being late but her morning activities had run over. I stood up and gave her a hug before she sat down. She had her hair in pigtails, and she was wearing a pink language school polo shirt, and a pair of denim shorts. She looked beautiful, happy, and I was ever so proud of her. The dark cloud of her break-up with Maya was definitely gone.
‘You look cheerful,’ I said, and she gave me a huge smile.
‘I am. Work is awesome and the people are great,’ said Dolly, picking up a menu.
‘Order whatever you want, Dolls. I think I’m going to go with the New York pastrami on rye sandwich, and a flat white.’
‘Oh yeah, that sounds good, me, too.’
I walked up to the counter to order our food, and while I waited in a short queue, I looked back at Dolly, who was staring down at her phone. I couldn’t help but be overcome with a nostalgia for the past when she was just a little girl. I imagined her sitting there but ten years younger, eagerly waiting for lunch, looking around because she didn’t have a phone yet, and I felt that feeling all parents get when faced with the reality that their child was all grown up. A bittersweet sadness, a longing for the past, but also a deeply profound pride in how their child had turned out. Dolly was about to head off to university, and I was excited at all the wonderful things she was going to experience, but also terribly sad at the little girl I had to leave behind.
I ordered our food, sat back down again, and Dolly put her phone away.
‘How’s work?’ I asked, because I had barely seen Dolly since she had started.
‘Brilliant, so much fun. It’s hard work, obviously, and the hours are long.’
‘Is that why you stay over so often?’ I replied, and she grinned, and looked a bit sheepish. ‘What? Spill the beans, young lady.’
‘I’ve met someone.’
‘Oh, right.’
‘Her name’s Elle, she’s from Nottingham, and she’s going to uni in Newcastle.’
‘That’s great, Dolls. She obviously makes you happy.’
‘She does,’ said Dolly with a huge smile, and then our food and coffee arrived. The waitress put it all down on the table, and it looked delicious. I took a sip of coffee, and Dolly quickly tucked into her sandwich. I had a bite of mine, too, but all I could think about was how happy Dolly was, and I hoped I wasn’t about to ruin everything.
‘So, Dolls, I have something to tell you,’ I said, as she took a sip of her coffee.
‘Okay.’
‘Have you spoken to your mother the last couple of days?’ I asked apprehensively.
‘No. Why? What have you done now?’
‘Why do you assume I’ve done something wrong?’
