Page 90 of Crave
“Ma’am?”
The voice jarred me, I whirled around to see a uniformed guard emerging from the trees, his expression sharp and suspicious.
“Are you supposed to be here?” He asked, his hand hovering too close to the gun on his belt.
I stumbled backward, the wrought iron fence scraping against my palm. My heart thundered, each beat punctuated by the echoes of screams in my mind.
“Well?” The guard stepped closer, his tone growing more aggressive. “This is private property. If you’re not meant to be here, leave.”
I nodded and took another step back. My throat was dry, but I managed to force out a whisper. “I’m sorry.”
He didn’t move until I turned and walked away, the weight of his gaze pressing against my back like a loaded gun.
I didn’t know where I was going.
The streets blurred together, my footsteps pounding in time with the relentless voice in my head.
ANGEL, NO.
PLEASE!
BOOM!
I flinched at the phantom sounds, my breath shallow. The edges of my vision darkened as I stumbled into a park. Children laughed and played on swings, their carefree shrieks clashing with the chaos in my mind, mothers sat on benches, chatting and sipping coffee, oblivious to the girl who didn’t belong.
I drifted toward the shadow of the bridge, my feet moving on autopilot. Beneath the cold concrete, the world felt heavier. The laughter of children faded, replaced by the low hum of passing cars.
Angel, you’re mine now,Lincoln whispered in my head.
I dropped to my knees, leaning against the cool stone wall. My arms wrapped around my body, trembling as I fought to breathe. My mind clawed at the edges of a memory I didn’t want to see but couldn’t escape.
Gunpowder. Bitter and sharp. The metallic tang of blood. My father’s scream.
Angel, NO!
And then…silence.
My hands flew to my ears, desperate to block out the phantom sounds. Tears burned hot trails down my cheeks as I rocked backand forth. The words Lincoln had whispered before he left me echoed louder, crueler.
All that blood,he whispered in my head and the world around me swayed. I closed my eyes as the scent filled my mind.
My fingers shook, dancing and trembling against my thigh until I wrapped my arms around my body and stumbled against the wall. No one could offer me salvation. Not Penn or his father. Not from what I’d done…and I had done that, hadn’t I?
I murdered my parents.
I hit the hard concrete barrier and slowly slid to the ground. The squeals of children rang out, but the gleeful sound didn’t linger in the darkness where I was. No, nothing did…but the memories of what I’d done. Tears came, blurring the cracked and weathered pillars before they slid down my cheeks and fell.
But I made no move to brush them away.
I couldn’t…because I was back there.
In that room…
With that monster.
You’ve done so well, Angel. So well…now lay back and spread your legs, let’s make a beautiful movie for Mommy dearest.
A sob tore free as I clung to myself. I dragged my knees upwards and lowered my head, desperately wanting to disappear. But I couldn’t…could I? Because Silas just wouldn’t let me go.
