Page 88 of Not Quite a Lady
The ladies completed their shopping to their perfect satisfaction and Penelope’s day was crowned with glory by being allowed to drive back with her brother in the curricle.
Caroline explained once they had set off, that she did not feel that some of the childbed details from her visit to Mrs Hodges were quite suitable for Penny’s tender ears.
Lily was not at all certain she wanted to hear them either. Remarks such asseven pounds and eight ounces, andin labour for thirty hoursmade her feel quite dizzy, although Caroline and even Susan were taking these horrid revelations perfectly calmly.
‘I suppose you do not visit many lying-in mothers, Miss French,’ Lady Allerton remarked. ‘As we have many tenants, naturally the older girls and I do so quite often.’
‘Oh, yes, I can imagine you would.’
There was an entire world out there, of tenants and one’s obligations to them, that Lily knew nothing about. By the time the Lovell sisters married they would know just how to manage the domestic duties of an estate, whereas if she and Jack had been so foolish as to…
Her mind baulked at the thought, then she made herself follow it through. If they had married she would have had to learn all these things about tenants from scratch and as for childbirth, that would have had to be encountered too, very personally indeed.
The damp moorlands and solid clumps of windswept beech trees passed the carriage windows while Caroline and Susan left the subject of babies and began to bicker gently over which of the new ribbons would look best with Mama’s second-best muslin.
Lily gazed unseeing out of the window and thought about children. She had never considered them before, assuming that babies would just come along as a consequence of marriage.
The image of Adrian’s children had never entered herimagination, but now she found herself trying to conjure up Jack’s. Her children with Jack. What would they have looked like?
Would they have had her dark red hair, or his black silk? Green eyes or flint? Her impetuosity and stubbornness or his pride and courage?
Possibly the poor little things would have had the worst characteristics of both parents and would have had red hair and a forceful chin allied to a stubborn nature and a regrettable taste for gold and glitter. She would never know.
‘A penny for your thoughts, Lily,’ Susan said brightly. ‘They must be very interesting, because you were smiling, and now you look quite melancholy.’
‘My thoughts? Only fantasy,’ Lily prevaricated. ‘I was thinking about…about a play I saw.’
‘And was it a tragedy?’
‘I hope not,’ she said earnestly, only realising, when the words were out of her mouth, that they would make no sense to her audience.
The bustle of arrival at the castle saved her from having to explain herself, although Caroline’s quizzical glance warned her that perhaps she saw more than Lily found entirely comfortable.
The footman stood patiently while the ladies tumbled out of the carriage, pressing parcels into his hands, issuing instructions on what was to go where and impressing upon him that he must be absolutely certain that Miss Susan’s new bonnet did not get crushed.
The curricle had arrived just before them and Jack was on the ground, reaching up his hands to lift Penny down. It made a charming picture, the strong big brother lifting down the pretty girl.
One day he would be standing like that, lifting his daughter down, tossing her up just a little to make her squeal as Penny,despite all her pretensions to be almost a young lady, was doing uninhibitedly.
Behind Lily Caroline laughed. ‘Jack spoils that child outrageously.’
‘I think it charming,’ Lily retorted. ‘He will make an excellent father.’
‘Indeed he will. Perhaps we should find him a wife,’ Caroline said lightly. ‘I rely on you to help me, Lily – I am sure between us we can find him a charming bride.’
Chapter Twenty One
‘You have managed to tear yourselves away from your purchases, I see.’ Jack uncoiled himself from the depths of a wing chair in front of the fireplace in the drawing room as Lily and Caroline came in. ‘I was resigned to dining alone this evening.’
‘I think we have done very well,’ Caroline congratulated herself. ‘Both Lily and I resisted the temptation to put on anything new tonight, but Mama purchased a very dashing turban and is trying it out on us before she risks it in company and Susan and Penny are bickering over who is going to wear the gauze shawl they bought jointly.’
‘Do turbans take a long time?’ Jack enquired with a reasonable pretence of interest.
‘This one does,’ Caroline chuckled. ‘Mama is having doubts about it and Maria must have done her hair about three times already in an attempt to please her. For goodness sake, admire it lavishly when she finally appears.’
‘Very well, I will do my best.’
Lily felt Jack’s eyes on her and struggled to find a topic for small-talk. She had never had the slightest problem in talking to him before. Now, when they were supposedly behaving in a manner which should have put all embarrassments behind them, she felt more awkward than she had ever done.
