Page 60 of The Lady Who Said No to the Duke
Yes, she reminded herself,that is what he wants, hisduchess.His very convenient duchess with the right ancestry, connections and upbringing.There is only one of us here who is in love.
Did Hal think she had forgotten and forgiven his deception?That he no longer had to atone for that?Not that Thea knew what would constitute an apology that would make her trust him completely again, and trust was the problem for her.He had deceived her completely before.How could she ever believe what he told her about his feelings now?
She would never have to lie to Hal about her own, she was certain, because there was never going to be a declaration of love for her to respond to.
‘Is everything all right?’
A quick upwards glance showed her the concern on Hal’s face.‘Yes, of course.’
‘Only you sighed just now.Such a very deep, sad-sounding sigh.’
‘My new shoes pinch,’ Thea improvised.‘You would sigh too if your feet hurt.’
‘Is it necessary to suffer for fashion’s sake?’he asked quizzically.
‘Sometimes I think so, but then I imagine having to wear the styles of Mama’s youth, or Grandmama’s, and I am devoutly glad no hoops are involved, let alone wigs and powder and patches and feathers.’
‘Hoops are still worn for Court Drawing Rooms,’ he reminded her.‘And ostrich plumes.’
‘I know,’ Thea said with a shudder.‘And it is so ridiculous—the hoops are still required, but the waists have risen with fashion, so the hoops are right under one’s arms and one cuts such a ludicrous figure.’
‘I hear the Prince Regent has vowed to do away with hoops when he ascends to the throne.’
‘How distasteful that he anticipates his own father’s death by speaking of plans for when he succeeds him,’ Thea said.
‘I agree.It is doubtless verging on treason to say so, but I have never encountered a more selfish or self-centred person in my life.’
‘I agree.So we can begin our married life in the Tower of London for our opinions,’ she said with a laugh, her spirits restored a little.It felt good to have her friend Hal to share jokes or silly fantasies with again.
Not that friendship would get her very far in the marriage bed, Thea thought, her spirits taking another sudden plunge.
* * *
There had been something upsetting Thea the day before at that ridiculous Venetian Breakfast.Hal realised that he was fidgeting with his gloves as the carriage sat unmoving in Piccadilly’s customary jam of traffic.
The congestion was caused by an incoming coach from the west of England arriving at the White Horse Cellar, he guessed.That was enough of a show to regularly draw crowds of onlookers, one of the ‘sights’ of London that visitors would include on their itineraries.
He pulled off his gloves and laid them on his knee, smoothing them into order as he thought back.Thea was no longer angry with him, he was sure of that.At times the day before it was as though they were back at Holme Lacey and were friends again, able to share a joke or laugh at the ridiculous.
There had been moments too when he thought she might be feeling some of the physical attraction that he most certainly was.That delicate blush… He did not think she was afraid of him, of that side of marriage, which was a relief,both because he wanted her to feel safe, but also because, selfishly, he was finding it increasingly difficult not to sweep her into his arms and…
No.Because then she became cool, just a little formal and there was a distance between them he could not explain.Perhaps she had not forgiven him after all, did not trust him completely.He had no idea how to deal with that, except by being totally honest with her at all times.And taking great care not to rush things, to give way to his own feelings.
But she had spoken of Leaming Castle ashome.That meant a lot.He would have to make certain she felt like that once they were married.
The carriage was moving again and must have been for several minutes, he realised, glancing out of the window.He was almost at her door and it was time to make a fresh start.
The family were waiting for him in more force than he had expected.All four of Thea’s brothers were on parade, the strain of behaving themselves visible on the faces of the two youngest.But they shook hands politely and stood quietly for a few minutes of small talk.
Hal was certain he saw movement in the pocket of the youngest—Ernest, was it?—a mouse or a frog most likely.He caught Thea’s eye and tipped his head in the direction of the youngster and saw her spot the same thing.Her lips twitched.
‘I think the boys can run along now Hal has met them, don’t you, Mama?’she asked.
‘Yes, of course.Say goodbye, boys.’
They all bowed and obeyed, although the oldest one, Piers, showed some resentment at being labelled a ‘boy’ and classed with his young brothers.Hal could see himself filling the role of elder brother to that cub before long.
Lady Wiveton steered them all towards a grouping ofchairs and a sofa with, beside one of them, a notebook and pencil.
