Page 4 of Bliss: Part 2
Three days.
It’s been three long fucking days without Bliss.
Three days without the girl who lit up every single room she walked into. The girl who made everything better just by being nearby. The girl who was my anchor. She was to all of us.
And now she was gone.
And I had no idea how I was supposed to keep living my life without her in it.
But I didn’t let myself think that far ahead. I couldn’t. Because the second I imagined a future without her, it felt like the ground opened beneath me.
We’d find her.
We had to.
Wewill, Lissy.
I promise.
***
I stepped out onto the porch later that night, unable to think straight in the emptiness of my room. Without her, no room in this house felt right. I wasn’t surprised to see Ashby already out there, sitting on the steps with his elbows on his knees, a hoodie pulled over his head.
He looked like hell.
Which meant I probably did too.
I sat down next to him without saying anything for a minute. We just listened to the night sounds, the wind shifting through the trees, the lake’s small waves hitting the shore. Our world had gotten too quiet lately.
“I can’t fucking breathe sometimes,” I finally said.
Ashby glanced over at me, then looked down at the gravel under his shoes. “Yeah. Same.”
I rubbed at my face with both hands. “I keep thinking if I hadn’t stayed back to help you guys with the damn barn, if I’d just gone with her, we wouldn’t be here.”
Ashby didn’t answer right away. Then, quietly, he said, “You’re not the only one thinking shit like that. It’s not our fault.”
“Doesn’t stop it fromfeelinglike it is,” I said.
That was the problem. Logic didn’t help grief. Grief didn’t care about sense. It just picked at you until you bled.
“You think she’s okay?” I asked.
Ashby was quiet for a long moment. Then he nodded. “Yeah. I think she’s scared. I think she’s waiting. But I don’t think she’s gone.”
“I feel her too,” I whispered. “Still here. I don’t know how to explain it. It’s just this…gut thing. Ifeelher.”
“Me too,” he said. “I swear sometimes I turn a corner and expect to see her. Like she’s just gonna be standing there, arms crossed, pissed we made such a big deal out of this.”
That made me smile. Ever so slightly. “She’d totally be pissed.”
“She’d say we were being dramatic,” Ashby muttered, then laughed softly, but it cracked halfway through. I could hear the ache behind it.
I glanced at him, then down at the porch between us. “Ash…if she doesn’t…”
“Don’t,” he cut in.
“But if shedoesn’t…”
