What do you want to get out of this relationship?
What expectations do you have of this relationship?
Where do you see yourself in five years? Ten? One hundred? One thousand?
Do your views and wishes align? What obstacles are there, and how can you overcome them? What compromises are you willing or unwilling to make?
(For more information about communicating your unique needs as a vampire, see “How (and When!) to Have the Vampire Talk With Your Loved Ones.”)
Safe Sex Practice—Frequently Asked Questions
Humans and vampires may look alike, but in addition to fangs, many bodily functions differ. You can read more about the physical changes of a vampire in the pamphlet “Your Vampire Body and You: A Guide to Vampiric Puberty.”
“WHY DO MY FANGS KEEP COMING OUT?”
It is normal to experience thirst while aroused. You should alwaysmake sure you have had blood before intercourse if you do not intend to feed during. Regardless, fangs are sharp, so be aware of them.
“CAN A VAMPIRE HURT A HUMAN DURING SEX?”
It is equally as possible as a human hurting a human during sex. Positive sexual experiences are all about boundaries, communication, and consent.
“WHAT ABOUT CONSENT?”
Consent is no different for vampires than humans. It must be given before and throughout the act of intimacy, for both sex and feeding.
It is recommended that vampires have sex only with humans who know they are vampires, to avoid any consent issues regarding species and age differences.
Vampire saliva contains a trace amount of mild aphrodisiac, but it is not strong enough to impact consent.
“DO I STILL HAVE TO WEAR A CONDOM?”
Vampires cannot contract or spread sexually transmitted diseases, and they cannot impregnate or be impregnated. However, it is recommended to use a condom for clean-up and comfort.
“HOW CAN I DRINK BLOOD SAFELY DURING A SEXUAL ENCOUNTER?”
Never have sex with or drink from a human while hungry, to avoid overfeeding. Have your human partner eat or drink something sugary to maintain energy.
Make sure all parties involved know what to expect and are fully consenting.
Drink from the neck or wrists for safe access to blood flow.
Your partner will experience a sharp pain from the initial piercing before a soothing, pleasurable venom calms them. Stop immediately if your partner expresses discomfort after the initial piercing.
Pay attention to your partner’s pulse and only drink a little at a time. It is better to drink too little than too much.
Remember, you can always reach out to your clan leader for additional advice or resources.
The pins-and-needles tingle on Brennan’s skin told him the wards were working as Cole invited him into his and Mari’s little duplex on the opposite side of campus from Brennan and Tony’s place. Cole kicked off his Converse at the entrance and headed for the milk crates full of records in the corner of the living area. Brennan paused to take in the space, now that he was seeing it without a flood of drunken college kids or the vague threat of Mari’s presence. It was cozy and hipstery, like Cole. It smelled like cinnamon and vanilla, like he’d been baking recently. He probably had.
“I’m gonna be honest, it’s kind of intimidating to choose a perfect first record for you,” Cole said, kneeling next to the crates and shuffling through.
Brennan stepped toward him but couldn’t help getting distracted by the photos covering the wall. He hadn’t looked too carefully at them in the dim light the other night, but they were hard to ignore. They were overwhelmingly of the same three people: Cole, younger but just as smiley; Mari, with longer curly hair and crooked glasses; and someone else, a taller boy who looked like an older, darker-haired, chain-smoking alter ego to Cole, armed in every photo with a cigarette and a permanent frown. The trio seemed to be friends from a young age—selfies and photos going back to Cole with braces and Cole with buckteeth, Mari pudgy and with wider smiles, the other boy growing his hair out into a ponytail over time. He must have been—
“Noah,” Cole called from where he was on the floor, shuffling through records. “My brother.”
“Yeah,” Brennan said. “He looks like you.”
“Well, he’s older, so he always used to say thatIlooked likehim.” He had a distant look on his face as he took in the wall of photos, and then quickly pulled their attention back to the boxes of records with a sharp, “So! What do you want to listen to?”
