“But, I’m twenty-eight. I’ve dated but never actually moved into relationship land.”
“Why do you think that is?”
“I could say it’s the guys I dated, but I’m the one who chose them. A few of them, like Todd, I knew what I was getting into. Sometimes I think I picked them because I knew it wasn’t going to be forever, but a right-now kind of thing. I didn’t want to feel lonely at the time, but I was okay with being alone.” She shakesher head, and then slaps her hands back up to her eyes. “Does that make any sense?”
“Come here.” I prod her, taking her hands off her eyes again, and this time holding them tightly in mine so she can’t hide behind them. “It sounds like you were being smart. Safe. You were right to do that, it’s self-preservation.”
Bright aquamarine eyes send a sparkle my way as she tilts her head to one side and looks at me, smiling. “That’s a better way to look at it.”
“It’s a matter of perspective, really. You didn’t want to give away your heart, so you guarded it.” Raising her hands to my lips, I kiss the backs of both, letting my mouth linger for a second too long on each one, her sigh telling me I’m on track. “Commitment is serious, and when you trust someone else enough that you want to be their person, you need to know you’re both in it for the right reasons and you’re in it together.”
“Very true, and exactly how I see it,” she says as she nods in agreement. “Which is probably why I've been so scared of it for so long. It’s one of the reasons I got so close to Levi when we were in high school.”
“Oh?” Can’t lie, a little knife stabs at my heart, but then I remember it’s Levi and I’ve met him. No need for jealousy.
“He knew I was uncomfortable around boys, especially when they’d hit on me. He became my go-to date as teens and we just promised we’d always be each other’s backup if we needed it.”
“So there was never anything that went on between the two of you?” I have to ask. It’s my duty.
“No way.” She giggles. “But if I do ever get married, he’s a bridesmaid. And vice versa. When he finally walks down the aisle, I’m one of his groomsmen, although I guess I’d be a groomswoman?”
“Okay,” I say, but it comes out a little more enthusiastic than intended.
She does a double-take and looks my way. “Wait. Were you having a moment thinking Levi was more than a friend to me? No, no!” She shudders as she cracks up. “I took you out the other day because I wanted you to have a man date.”
“A man date?”
“Yes! I wanted you to meet a couple of guys who are in the same boat as you. In a position where they’re in the public eye but having to be all physical and stuff, while still being very laid-back and true to themselves and their families.” She shrugs a shoulder nonchalantly. “I just wanted you to make friends.”
The fact that she wanted this for me? Yes, my mind is blowing up, but not like my heart.
“Thank you for that. For thinking of me.”
“Of course,” she says with a smile as she looks at her watch. “Oh, wow, I need to get home. I really want a good night’s sleep tonight.”
“That’s right,” I say, standing and whistling for Posh. “Let’s get going and you can tell me what I need to wear for tomorrow.”
“Love that,” she says, only turning away from me when Becks barrels up the hill and slams into her legs, flopping at her feet and rolling onto his back. “What are you doing?”
“He’s showing you he trusts you,” I say, pointing to his belly. “He wouldn’t be showing you that part of him unless you were in the circle of trust.”
“Good boy, Becks.” She ruffles his fur, then clips the leash onto his collar and stands to face me, her hand on her hip. “I like being in the circle of trust.”
Stepping forward, I reach out and take her hand, gently tugging it so that she has to take a step closer to me. I lean down and place my forehead gently against hers.
I make my face twist so it’s really serious. “Should I show you my belly?”
“If you want,” she says, her fingertips dancing across my abs as she grins. “Good abs. Solid, but I’m sure you know that.”
She pulls her hand away, and I’m laughing. Again. I don’t think I’ve laughed as much in my life as I've done with Riley.
“What I do know is that I want to be the person who changes your mind.”
She takes a step away from me and looks me up and down. “Changes my mind?”
I nod. “If I have my way, Riley Richards, I’ll be your first and your last boyfriend. I want it to be that you look forward to commitment because it’ll be with me. But I want you to know it’s right—so I guess I need you to trust that it is first.”
A shy smile creeps across her face, the ends of her lips turning upward as if they were aimed at heaven.
