Page 30 of Saving Tracey
Somehow, I knew Trevor would never hurt me.
"Don't fucking touch me."
"Don't play fucking games with me, Tracey.” His eyes flashed between anger and concern as he lit his cigarette. “You want to think that nobody fucking cares because you were hurt for so fucking long, but if anyone fucking cares, it's me, Tracey. I know what you're going through. I've been through it, too." He ran his hand through his dark hair, taking a drag off his cigarette as he lit it. "Now, what happened?” His eyes were calm when they met mine again. “Something's definitely bothering you."
"I just got threatened to be put in a mental institution.” I kicked the dirt with my shoe. I looked up at him. "Could they really do that?"
He took a drag off of his cigarette before he rubbed it against the brick wall behind him, sticking it back in its cigarette pack. Trevor nodded his head at me in answer. "Yep, they sure can." His dark eyes met mine, concern flickering in their depths. "Who threatened to do that to you?"
"The social worker that's working my case.”
He leaned against the wall of the school and crossed his arms over his muscular chest, the muscles in his arms flexing with the movement. "I'm guessing someone spilled the beans that you tried to commit suicide the other night?"
I nodded, a scowl covering my features. "Why can't people just leave me alone?" I just wanted to be left alone to do what I wanted. It was my life.
Meaning if I wanted to commit suicide, it should be my decision.
Trevor leaned forward, his smoky scent filling my nostrils. My breath hitched in my throat at his close proximity, my heartbeat picking up pace in my chest. "Because we care, Tracey; I care."
With that, he walked off.
When I got home, I went straight up to my room. Kaleb and the guys had gone to the lake as they had planned earlier that day. Krista went shopping with some of her friends, and Emily stayed at the library after school to study. I walked home by myself.
I was finally alone. I could finally do this.
I pulled the scissors out of my bag and walked to my bathroom. Closing and locking the bathroom door behind me, I pushed my sleeve up and placed the scissors against my skin. I was finally going to leave this world of pain and hurt. I wouldn't have flashbacks anymore. I wouldn't feel the pain of him beating on me.
I slid the scissors across my wrist and sighed in contentment.
Yes, this was what I needed.
I leaned my head back against the wall, closing my eyes. I could feel the blood pooling on my lap. It was so silent, I could hear it dripping onto the floor.
It was bliss.
"Tracey!"
I didn't respond. I could feel myself getting light-headed. I could feel it ending. My mom wasn't here to stop it this time. She wasn't there to bandage it up.
"Tracey, I know you're home! The door was unlocked! Where are you?!" I could hear the panic filtering into Miss Brinson’s voice, but I didn’t care.
I was so glad I had locked the door. No one could stop me this time.
I slipped into unconsciousness.
TREVOR
We walked into the house, laughing at something stupid Paul had said. I smacked my adopted brother on the back of the head, barking out a laugh when he whined like a five-year-old.
"Tracey, open this door!" Panic coated Miss Brinson’s voice. "Please, Tracey, at least just answer me!"
I shoved Kaleb out of the way, running up the stairs to Tracey’s bedroom. Kaleb's mom was banging on her bathroom door, tears flowing down her cheeks. She looked at me desperately. "I know she's in there. I can't get the door open. Something’s wrong, Trevor.”
I lifted my foot up, kicking the door open. Tracey was laying on the floor in a pool of her own blood. "No, no, no, no. Christ, Tracey, do not fucking leave me."
"I'm calling 911. Try to get her to wake up, please." Tears clogged her voice, and it shook. We all cared about Tracey so much, but right now, we were no match for the dark thoughts in her head.
"Oh my God.” Shock colored Kaleb’s features. "How the fuck did she manage to do this?"
