Page 56 of Montana Groom of Convenience
“That’s so.” He met her look. Found sweet release in her words.
“I think you should stop blaming yourself for their deaths. Your mama wouldn’t like it.”
He wanted to dismiss the idea. But every time she said he wasn’t to blame, he grew closer to believing it. “I’ll try to stop blaming myself.”
She chuckled. “It’s hard to let go of an old belief, isn’t it? Try putting a new one in its place.”
“What are you suggesting?” He hoped she had a concrete idea.
“A Bible verse. ‘Give thanks unto the Lord: for He is good: for His mercy endureth forever.’”
He breathed in the words, letting them sink into the depths of his being. Yes, God was good. Even when created mankind wasn’t. “That’s a good verse to remember.”
She stepped away, heading for the barn. “I have something to do.”
She’d changed from her dress to trousers, and her wide-brimmed hat hung down her back.
“You’re going riding?” It was as much a statement as a question.
“Kate said they had kittens ready to leave their mama. I’m going to bring one home for Jill. I think she’d like that.”
He followed her and stayed nearby as she saddled Sunny. He couldn’t explain to anyone, least of all himself, why he could barely restrain himself from reaching out and grabbing the bridle and begging her to stay.
She led the horse from the barn. “Make sure Jill is okay.”
They stood inches apart. Don’t go, his heart said. “Be careful,” his mouth said.
She grinned and stretched up on tiptoe, and planted a kiss on his cheek.
Before he could react, she swung into the saddle and called, “Never. I’ll never be careful.” She waved.
He lifted his hand in a farewell salute as she rode away. After she was out of sight, he realized his arm was still raised, and he lowered it just enough to touch the spot she’d kissed. He was grateful no one could see him standing in the middle of the yard, grinning widely at nothing.
After a bit, he pulled himself together and returned to the house, where he had to explain that Carly had gone for a ride. He didn’t want to tell Jill about the kitten. Let it be a surprise.
Jill and Father Morrison had set up a checkers game and played it.
Sawyer wandered from window to window.
“Son, it’s too early for her to be back. You might as well light somewhere before you wear a trench in the floor.”
He hadn’t realized he’d made so many trips. “I’ll do the chores.”
“You do that.” Father Morrison sounded relieved at Sawyer’s announcement, and Jill giggled.
Out in the barn, he fed the animals, which didn’t take nearly long enough. He checked the harnessing. All in good shape. He climbed the ladder to check on the hayloft. And if he pushed open the doors, allowinghim a view of the trail that would bring Carly home, it was purely coincidental. Wasn’t it?
He was happy he didn’t have anyone there with him to demand an honest answer.
He sat in the doorway, his feet swinging until he saw her coming. He stayed there until she was almost close enough to see him watching and waiting before he closed the doors and slipped down the ladder.
He was brushing Big Harry when she led her horse into the barn.
“See what I have.” She pulled a fluffy gray-and-white kitten from her shirt and held it close to her face. The kitten meowed and licked her cheek.
Carly laughed. “It’s very affectionate. The friendliest one of the bunch. Do you want to hold her while I take care of Sunny?” She took his agreement for granted and handed him the little bundle of fur.
The kitten was soft and warm and purred. “I haven’t had a cat since...” His voice trailed off.
