Page 93 of Montana Groom of Convenience
“He’s been toying with us this whole time.” Letting them believe if she did certain things, he wouldn’t sell the ranch.
An uncertain smile lifted Sawyer’s lips. “Not that it’s been so bad, though.”
Their gazes held.
She allowed a little smile. “There are parts I don’t regret. But—” How could she ignore the fact her father was this very minute planning to sell the place? After pushing her into marriage? After forcing her to invite Sawyer into her room? But like he said, it wasn’t all bad, and she certainly didn’t regret that he was her husband.
In name only. She went to the window and watched their progress— her stomach burning. She’d hoped to find the courage to tell Sawyer of her changing feelings, and now this. Prospective buyers. Father showing them around when he should be telling them the place was no longer for sale.
She stayed at the window, Sawyer by her side, until the little group made its way back to the house.
Rather than come inside, the Jacobses returned to their buggy.
Good. They were leaving.
Father stepped inside. Jill sat down on the grass to play with the kitten.
“They changed their mind?”
“Not at all. They are going to see as much of the land as they can. Someone should show them around,but I cannae.” He gave Carly and Sawyer dark looks. “Aye, and it appears I’ll get no help here.”
“I can’t believe—” What was the use? He’d never seen her for who she was. Why should she expect he would now?
“I invited them to join us for dinner.”
She stuffed back all the angry words rushing to her mind.
“Aye, but they refused. I dinnae doubt they felt the lack of hospitality.” He plunked down at the table. “Wouldn’t yer mother be dismayed?”
“Aye, and now wouldn’t she be?” Likely as much at father as at daughter. “Mother would never go back on her word.”
“Aye,” he said, but he didn’t change his mind.
It was past dinnertime, and she was hungry, so she served the meal. Despite her hunger, she found it difficult to swallow and finally scraped most of her food into the cat dish. As soon as she had the dishes done, she hurried to her room to change into trousers.
She sat on the edge of the bed and let the memories of Sawyer rushing to rescue her from the flames drown out the bitter taste of her father’s treachery. She’d seen the fear in Sawyer’s eyes and had an inkling of how he must have felt to see flames catching on her skirt. He’d demanded to know why she wasn’t wearing trousers. The question brought a sweet smile to her lips. So unlike Bart wanting her to pretty up. It seemed Sawyer accepted her the way she was.
She didn’t need to put on a dress to please him or to gain his attention.
I want to be your wife.
She’d almost said how she felt. And then the Jacobses had come along, upsetting everything.
She pulled her dress off, jerked on her trousers, and strode from the room. “I’m going for a ride.” The freedom of the open spaces, the wind tugging at her hair, and the thrill of being at one with her horse would go a long way to easing her tangled thoughts. She saddled Sunny and galloped from the yard. Just before she disappeared around the barn, she caught a glimpse of Sawyer and Jill standing in the doorway, watching.
This isn’t about you, she wanted to shout. But they wouldn’t hear her. She rode hard over the hills until she reached the secret little lake. She walked Sunny to cool him and then flung herself to the ground. She walked back and forth along the verge of the lake. She kicked at clumps of grass and tossed twigs into the water. Finally, her anger mostly spent, she sat down and stared at the water. What would she do if Father sold the ranch? What would happen to Sawyer and Jill?
There would be no reason to continue their marriage agreement.
She sat with her legs drawn up, her chin propped on her knees, and let sorrow and sadness consume her. After a bit, her feelings abated, and she was able to take each thought out and examine it, trying to find a way to deal with it.
Would she have to say goodbye to the land she’d loved since she was a child?
More than that, she would have nothing to offer Sawyer. Would he decide he was done with their agreement?
She moaned as pain seared through her. With surprising clarity, she realized the source of her pain. Itwasn’t the thought of losing the ranch—as much as that would hurt. It was knowing she could lose Sawyer and Jill.
Oh God, help me. I don’t know if I can bear it if they leave.
