Page 4 of Silver Linings
“No, thanks. They’ll be fine.” He’s still looking past me.
“Are you sure? It’s really no prob?—”
I can’t even finish my sentence before he looks at his watch anxiously. “I’ve gotta go.” He leaves no room for argument before he takes off in the direction I just came from, and I watch him as he goes.
I don’t make it to work on time.
Instead, I alert Holly of my arrival by barreling through the front door, the bell ringing in my wake, and I’m instantly put at ease. Every time I step inside Brownstone Books I feel like I’ve come home again after being away too long. Like Ibelonghere.
Kena likes to joke that the store is my one true love because it’s the longest relationship I’ve ever had. He’s wrong—it’s theonlyrelationship I’ve had. It’s just always been easier for me to not do theromance thing. I’ve never particularly had the urge, and the way I figure it, the closer you get to someone, the greater risk you take of them leaving you. So, I keep it simple and keep my circle small—like count it on one hand small. My constants are Nan, Kena, and this shop, just the way I want it.
Holly steps out from the back room, shoulders easing when she sees it’s just me.
“I know, I know. I’m sorry. I’m later than I said I would be. Forgive me?” I curl my fists against my chest and give her my best pouty face.
A bout of fear claws at my chest thinking I might have inconvenienced her. The anxiety that seeps in through carefully held together cracks if anyone is upset with me, or if they don’t like me, is a feeling I’ve grown familiar with over the years. I know it’s impossible to please everyone, but I’m programmed to try. If they’re happy, maybe they’ll stay.
“I didn’t expect you to be on time, Silver.” Holly huffs a laugh. “Not after last night’s phone call.”
“God, I’m so sorry. Did I say anything mortifying? I can’t be held responsible. Everything is Kena and liquor’s fault.” I hold up my hands in placation, a surrender for mercy.
“Nothing out of the ordinary. You did propose to my wifeagain,but that’s fairly commonplace for you,” Holly says.
“Yes, well, she is an actual goddess. What else was I supposed to do?”
“I can’t even blame you.” Holly’s eyes take on a dreamy quality.
Her wife Serafina is a baker with a famous cooking blog called Mental Bake Down. They met years ago in their twenties, and they realized pretty quickly that what they felt for each other was different. Holly always said she was lucky to be in Serafina’s orbit, that it was pure happenstance that landed her in the café where Sera was the head baker…but I see the way Sera looks at Holly. She looks at Holly like she’s the lucky one, bettered just by knowing her, let alone loving her. It’s pure, their love, two souls who complimentandchallenge each other, for better or worse. It makes my heart hurt sometimes to witness, knowing I’m not made for that.
I snap myself back into the present. “Full disclosure, I did have a coffee for you…but then I ran into a wall of a man and dropped it on the ground.”
“A wall of a man?” Holly repeats back to me.
“Yup,” I say, popping thep. “He was so tall, broad, and grumpy.”
“Stop drooling,” Holly calls me out of my reverie. “Did you get his number?”
“No. I tried, but he didn’t seem interested,” I pout.
“That’s…unusual for you.”
“He’s the one that got away,” I sigh dramatically.
“Okay, well, that’s a bit intense. Do you even know his name?”
“That is beside the point and completely irrelevant, Hols. He was the hottest man I’ve ever seen. Now, I’ll always wonder what could have been. I’ll be eighty in a nursing home, ranting to Kena about the walking sex symbol I spilled coffee on and how he could have been my best lay ever until Kena gets so tired of my rambling, he beats me to death with his badminton racket.” I suck in a breath of air. “The point is, I’ll never know, and the lack of knowledge will haunt me until the end of my days, because I will never see him again.” I slump against an age-worn bookshelf that creaks precariously under the pressure.
“Are you done?”
“I think so.” I pop up to stand.
“Great. We have some new releases to put out on the shelves.” Holly points at a shipment we must have gotten in this morning. “But you’re going to get me a coffee first.”
I start laughing as I grab my wallet.
“Flat white?” I ask as I back out of the shop, on my way to a different coffee house a block over.
“The biggest one they’ve got. Try not to spill this one on any other hot men!” She calls before I’m out of earshot.
