Page 14 of The Bright Side of Brooding
Chapter Seven
Nick
You are not here. Here, I keep wondering if I am. I am a bulb, flickering brighter, then dim. Dimming, almost burnt out. Almost to the rattle, the tinny absence of a glow. I am almost gone.
Frustration bit at my heels as I stalked down the clinic hallway. I’d finished physical therapy for this week, number four of six required sessions since the accident last month. Also the reason I felt particularly caged lately. I couldn’t work out at the intensity I liked, and these sessions hardly seemed to help.
That’s not fair, Nicholas. Are you sure that’s an accurate statement?
Gran’s voice played inside my head as clearly as if she’d spoken the words to my face. Pain, sharp and hot as always, sliced through my chest. It’d been years—coming up on three years—since she’d really known me. So long since I’d had a conversation asme, and not a visiting, vague friend.
Her dementia came on hard and fast, and in half a year, we’d gone from her forgetting my mom’s name to forgetting me, standing right in front of her. The helplessness that comes from watching your loved one lose her tether to this world, to things and people she’d known all her life, was ruthless. The grieving that’d started then wasn’t all that different from what it was now that she was gone physically, too.
And the memory loss haunted me. Would my parents have faced that? Would I? Suddenly, I felt a pressing need tolive. And returning to my regular life, working day to day and training when I could… it didn’t feel like I was doing that just yet.
“Masters! Hold up.”
Alicia Cartwell waived her patrol cap at me when I turned back toward her voice.
A little leap chased that previously vicious grief. Summer Applegate stood next to her, her cheeks tinted just slightly. I approached the women, brow raised. Alicia knew me well enough to know I wouldn’t be speaking unless necessary. Wasn’t my way.
“Needed to ask you a few things. But first, do you know Summer Applegate? Summer, this is Sergeant Nick Masters. He’s my trainer here. He’s in the OPFOR battalion as well.” Alicia, her blond hair tucked into a neat bun at the back of her head, gestured between us.
“We’ve met. Nice to see you again.”
Nice to see you in something other than a full-body puff coat.Not that I’d say that aloud, but I didn’t mind taking in the look of her. I wouldn’t let my eyes slide along her scrubs, but I could appreciate the lack of bulky layers just the same. The panicked moment last week with the idiot on her doorstep didn’t count.
“Yes. Likewise. Did you need assistance?”
She cocked her head and had a look of efficiency about her. This was a woman who got things done. No meandering small talk about the weather orhow funnyit was that we both knew Alicia. Why did people always think coincidences werefunny? Anyway, none of that from Applegate, and it immediately made me respect her a bit more.
“No, ma’am. I just wrapped up a PT session.”
Understanding lit her eyes. Of course she knew about the incident and had probably received detailed reports of everyone and their injuries—she’d been feeding all of the people involved. But I suspected everyone in the clinic knew all the details of each soldier’s injuries and recovery. Mine wasn’t all that exciting, so they were welcome to it. I was one of only three who were being seen on post—everyone else had to see specialists on the German economy. And Summer would know that thanks to being privy to medical information. That, or Rob had gossiped about my busted hip. Come to think of it, I should ask him if he talked with her about me. Not that I cared. Just didn’t want anything to do with the rumor mill—didn’t need Rob feeding the machine.
“Good. I hope it went well.”
I nodded.
“Are you on the way out, then?” Alicia asked.
I nodded again.
“Perfect. I’ll follow you out.” She turned to Summer. “Thanks again. I’ll see you soon?”
Summer Applegate smiled at Alicia, full-out, and it hit me between the ribs.
“Absolutely. And Sergeant Masters, I’m sure I’ll see you sometime soon, too.” Then she directed that spotlight smile at me for a moment before she turned and left.
She certainly didn’t linger, nor did she try to throw food at me, so I could appreciate, again, the lack of shiny veneer today. The impression I’d gotten on our last encounter had stripped that away, too. Maybe I needed to get rid of that judgement altogether. But really, I hadn’t seen enough to prove otherwise.
Alicia and I walked side by side down the hall and out the clinic front doors. Once we reached the parking lot, she tilted her head to the side and eyed me.
“You know Summer?”
“We’re neighbors.”
She rolled her eyes. “Iknow that. But I didn’t realizeyoudid.”
