Page 57 of Made for You
Clearing my throat, I banished the verging tears. “I don’t want to lose her. She’s all I have.” And I’d never felt that more clearly than these last few months.
“At the risk of sounding self-absorbed, I have to take issue with that,” he said in a low, soothing voice.
I raised my brows in question.
One side of that handsome mouth tugged up. “I know we’re new, but this is different for me than—well, it’s just different. And I need you to know you’ve got me, too.”
I bit down hard to stem the tide of what would undoubtedly be tears. I wouldnotcry on my first date with this man. He could handle it, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to.
And yet, what a beautiful, terrifying notion. Did I have him?
CouldI have him, really?
There was nothing so heady as sitting across from the most attractive man I’d ever actually interacted with—Jack McKean and Bri Williamson might technically rival him for traditional beauty, but Bruce was word-stealing. And I’d come to know him enough that I recognized what an absolute gem he was. No way around it. He was the best of men, I already knew, and there he sat telling me I had him.
Me.A woman who’d never really had anyone other than my great-aunt, and she was technically obligated to be mine.
I could’ve laughed. I refused to cry.
“Does that seem crazy? I don’t want to freak you out, Nik, but I want you to know that. Even if what we have doesn’t… go where I’d like it to, you can count on me. And I’m pretty sure after those cookies, you can count on Kiley, too.”
Overwhelmed but wanting to make sure he knew he wasn’t upsetting me, I rushed in. “It doesn’t freak me out as much as… stun me. Not surprise, because we’ve acknowledged that whatever this is means something. I know that, and I’m so glad you feel it, too. But just… I can count on one hand the people who’ve been there for me, and only one of them is still around. It’s a big deal.”
He nodded, gaze steady on mine. “I know. I want it to be. It is to me, too.”
And though I didn’t know all of his past, sometimes I forgot that it was his military family, not his blood relations, who’d provided such stability for him. It could beme, too. I could be there for him like he wanted to be for me.
“Sometimes I forget you have your own messy past, because you’re so put together. You really need to let more things crash and burn so we can all get a glimpse of your humanity.” I gave him a wobbly smile.
He grinned—bright and true and so gorgeous, it made my chest ache.
“I think we both know I’m barely handling more than one thing.” His expression softened, and he leaned forward. “What’s your favorite thing, Nikki?”
I sat back, surprised by the change of subject, but welcoming it. “Math. That sounds so silly, but I love it. It just makes sense. Accounting isn’t my dream job, but it lets me deal with math and has an element of problem-solving I like.”
“Whatisyour dream job?”
A wistful sound escaped before I could stop it. “Teaching math. Probably at the college level because you get to dip toes into theory and such.”
Something settled behind his eyes, but I wasn’t sure what. It was like a decision.
“Is there a favorite thing? Some, uh,kindof math you like best? Or a proof or problem or—I don’t even know. The stuff Matt Damon solves inGood Will Hunting?”
I made no attempt to stifle the beaming smile. He was just so adorable. “Oh, I have all of those. But let’s see… I think one of my favorite things is Euler’s Formula. It’s kind of… perfect. It illuminates a lot of other concepts, and it’s… well, this might sound kind of weird, but it’s kind of romantic.”
His smile flashed. “Romantic? Math is romantic? I reallydon’tknow what I’m talking about then.”
I laughed, loving his willingness to engage on the subject. “Oh, it is very romantic.” I dropped my voice so it emerged low and sensual. “Just think about it. All that addition and multiplication…”
His eyes flared. “More on the formula, please.”
I bit my lip, admiring the glint in his eye that, if I wasn’t absolutely insane, hinted at this all actually doing something for him. “Euler’s formula is the equation that explains the relationship between trigonometric functions and exponential functions.”
He blinked. “I am sure that means something important, but I think we both know I have no idea what.”
Maybe it should’ve been a turn off, but I didn’t need him to know everything I did. I certainly didn’t know all the things he did. His willingness to admit he didn’t know was more attractive than any attempt to bluster through and pretend.
“Itisimportant. And maybe that’s the thing. It’s this small set of numbers and can mean nothing, but if someone knows the significance, it unlocks everything. It’s like a message waiting on the right person to unlock it. I love that.”
