Page 83 of Fighting For You
My answering grin could not be contained. “I like your style, Beast.”
He gave me a smug little look that sent heat to my toes.
“I like your everything, Pop.”
I floated on the nineteen stolen minutes with Jude for the next day and a half. Our schedules were as opposite as ever, but his text confirming Kenny had agreed to take his assignment tomorrow night sent me soaring.
Why did I suddenly have such trouble thinking about anything but him? I mean, I was standing in a room with Oscar winners and famous producers and geniuses of show business and all I wanted was to jump my taciturn ex-soldier’s bones.
Okay, wow.The kissing had left me feeling… well, hot. But it was that parting shot, his, “I like your everything,” that kept swirling around in my head.
Could it be true? Funny enough, I could say the same thing about him, so I didn’t necessarily disbelieve him. It just seemed… too perfect. Too much like something I’d always longed for.
That comment, and the way his hands felt so good wherever they touched, lingered in my mind. The way he knew when to challenge me, when to chase me, when to tease me… so good.
If I’d ever had doubts about his interest in somethingnow, they were non-existent. The trick was feeling like maybe that’s all this was, that maybe we were running off of his past feelings, my growing current ones, and if we keptgoing I’d end up head over heels while he felt free to walk away.
But there it was—the specter that haunted any relationship I even considered. With Kurt, I’d thought I’d found a home and a partnership. I’d decided he was it and maybe I’d even forced myself into believing it. Forced him, too, maybe. He was charming and easy and made me feel like I was his whole world and I’d let it happen because it fit the narrative I wanted. It had been a lovely little fantasy I didn’t mind wrapping up in right up until I realized it was just that—a total fantasy. I was the emperor standing naked, finally realizing his new clothes were nothing but the stuff of imagination and deception.
But things with Jude were different. First, I had no doubt he was a deeply faithful person in every aspect of his life, even to the point of being maddening. He’d refused to tell me what happened all those years ago in explicit detail because he’d believed it was wrong. This wasn’t the kind of man who cheated.
He would never cheat. And he had a life here with more than just me—he hadn’t built me up to be some kind of “everything” that set me up to fail. He had friends and a support system so robust I hadn’t even realized he was grieving his sole remaining family member.
But if he lost interest or never regained the depth of feeling he’d had for me, or worse, realized that what he thought he’d felt before he got to know me as he had lately was nothing substantial, he’d walk.
He was faithful, honorable, and ruthless. In work, and in life, he wouldn’t waste breath on something he didn’t care about. And I could only imagine how painful it would be to face an ending with Jude when he was ready to dispose of me.
So along with my cheery thoughts about hot kisses and warm, rough hands, I also had a plague of doubts and questions swirling around making me itch to see him for more than a few minutes so I could verbalize some of this.
By the next afternoon when I finally came off duty, only a few minutes from running home and getting showered up so I could go to Jude’s after turning my gear in, Luc and Bruce were talking in the entryway.
“Everything okay?”
Bruce wasn’t easily disgruntled, and as far as I was tracking, things had been going well with the event for us on the security end and the town overall.
Luc responded first. “I spoke with Jenn about a concern. Her response didn’t alleviate that concern.”
The beautiful man’s wrinkled brow went nowhere, and I could almost see his mind racing through what he’d learned. The comment sparked my memory of Cara’s odd statement a few days ago.
“Does it have anything to do with Anthony Pollusk, the producer?” I’d heard the name whispered and had gathered this must’ve been who Cara meant.
Both Bruce and Luc turned to me, eyes keen.
“Yes. What do you know?” Bruce asked.
“Not much. Only that when I saw Cara and Jenna the other day for a minute at Guac, Cara said something about going to her meeting with the ‘creepy producer.’ Jenna visibly deflated and they left almost immediately.” I’d made a point to track down information on the situation, but I’d utterly failed… so now was my chance.
Luc’s jaw ticked. “She’s been off for a few days. It has to be thanks to him.”
Bruce put a hand on Luc’s shoulder. “We don’t knowthat for sure, but I think it’s wise to dig deeper. I’ll call Julian and see if we can meet with Cara.”
“What can I do?” I asked, eager to help.
Bruce smiled. “You can go to dinner at Beast’s and take a night off. We’ll update you tomorrow.”
I sputtered, not expecting him to know about the plan or say anything if he did, but since he and Luc both chuckled, they clearlybothknew.
“Don’t be so surprised. Your man had to ask Kenny to cover his shift. Didn’t take long to break Kenny wide open about why he traded, and from there…”
