Page 42 of Known By You
I nodded, incapable of words. Some small flame of hurt and shame and hope and fear had been blown into a bonfire by this conversation and his well-meaning words. He’d touched on exactly my fears—that the pull towards Silverton and the people here, my family here, was telling me something real. It wasn’t just the frustrations piled up with this messfor now—it was hinting that the life I’d made for myself wasn’t much of one. And if that was true?
If I’d failed so spectacularly at making a meaningful life for myself, then what had even been the point of all of it? Of living away and missing out on time with Jo and even missing my parents, changed as they were?
Jane interrupted and I used the intrusion to excusemyself with a mumbled thanks and followed an agonized, stumbling path to the car.
I want the world for you.
What did that even mean? How was that attainable? And what was next? The moon and stars?
CHAPTER TWENTY
Kenny
Iwandered down the street, enjoying the way the white Christmas lights still lit all the trees in this part of town. They kept the trunks and branches wrapped with white lights until the end of ski season, likely knowing the quaint quotient for downtown increased that much more when tourists could wander in the dreamy atmosphere of our small mountain town.
I’d take it.
Most of the stores were closed save the restaurants, so the windows of Glazed and Cut and Bloom were all dark as I strolled by on the way to my car. I glanced up to see the stars twinkling brightly overhead, the day’s clouds hiding somewhere else so the sky could show off.
I stopped and breathed in the chilly winter air and?—
“Oh,” a voice said as someone collided with my back. Their hands wrapped around my chest like they weresearching for purchase, then disappeared in an instant when the person regained their footing.
“I am so sorry I?—”
Liz’s mouth was wide open, and she dropped her face into her hands.
Wait.Wait.That was not a normal response to bumping into someone, even if it was a bit of a rough one. I’d been the one to stop in the middle of the sidewalk. I hadn’t heard her behind me.
I moved toward her, tugging on her arm gently once, twice. She exhaled out a gusty sigh and the light from a nearby tree caught tears glittering in her eyes.
“What’s going on?”
She swiped angrily under her eyes. “I’m fine. It’s just been a day.”
I’d spent much of said day with her, so this didn’t give me much hope she returned the feelings I’d less than eloquently hinted at to Stone, but that wasn’t really the point.
“Tough family dinner?”
She wrapped her arms around herself. “It shouldn’t feel like it, but yeah. It was just my dad being this emotionally intelligent, engaged father and for some reason I feel like—” Her voice wavered, and she snapped her lips closed.
I waited, knowing she needed to finish the thought.Beggingher to finish whatever it was she was saying.
“I just feel like such a failure.” She looked up at the sky, avoiding eye contact with me, or maybe simply being drawn in by its beauty like I’d been moments ago.
I wanted to make this better—to give her space to keep talking and processing, to be the person who helped her, and to maybe give her a little more of these stars. I wanted her to have whatever she needed, whatever would give heraccess to the person she wanted to be, not just the default version she seemed to fight against.
“Can I take you somewhere? Are you free?”
She huffed a disbelieving laugh. “Uh. Sure. If I go home, I’ll just wallow.”
I flashed her my most charming grin and held out an elbow. “Well, we can’t have that, can we?”
The resounding silence of my house didn’t bother me the way it often did when I came in after dark. Not hard to guess it had everything to do with Liz being right here with me, and yet I didn’t want to acknowledge how much I liked leading her down the short entryway.
“Your house.”
She had been completely silent on the drive.
