Page 91 of Known By You
“You’ll be okay,” he said, giving me one of those patented Bruce Camden looks that held so much weight and faith in me.
My throat had tightened again, so I cleared it. “Yeah. I guess that’s the option.”
His kind, familiar smile greeted me when I glanced up again.
“It is indeed. And we’re all here for you, no matter what.”
We went our separate ways, and I wandered back to my little office, avoiding looking into Liz’s temporary one when I passed. I didn’t want to see her packing up stuff. I didn’t want to know if she’d already left for the day.
It was a few hours later when she knocked on my door. I stood instantly, heart hammering the second I saw her.
“Hey,” I said, somehow winded just by looking at her. She wore her hair in her signature bun and had on a button-up and gray slacks. I had the inane thought that I was glad I got to see her dressed like this because it’d be easier to imagine her back at work in a few days.
“Hey. I’m heading out.”
I squinted. “Good. Yeah.” I rounded my desk, summoning whatever bravery I could find. “I just want to say I’m glad you came here. I’m grateful for the time we had together. And I hope you have a beautiful life.”
Her lashes fluttered and she sniffed. “Thank you.But, hey, I’ll see you again, right? I don’t leave until Wednesday. I’ve got stuff lined up with family and everything, but I’d love to see you at least one more time.”
I forced a chuckle. “Of course. I’d love that. And I hope you enjoy the time with family. I’m sure Jo has something fun planned.”
This was all so surface level. So mundane and it felt like such a waste.
It felt like my heart was army-crawling its way up my throat.
She smiled, too. “Yeah. I’ve got to eat as much Mexican food as possible in the next few days.”
We talked another minute, lame small talk stuff, and then she left.
I sat back down at my desk and stared at the screen, willing myself to find something to do to channel this genuine angst trying to choke out my good sense.
What I’d said was true, though. I was grateful. Even now, the agony of this distance growing between us, both emotionally and physically, I was grateful for every second she spent with me.
Eventually, I’d sit here and not think of her standing in my doorway. At some point, I’d look up at Silver Ridge Peak and not think of the times we’d spent in my back yard by the fire with the stars overhead and the shadowy mountains setting the scene.
Someday, maybe I’d want to touch someone else, and want to be touched. I’d long for a kiss from someone who wasn’t her. I’d hope for a future with someone else.
And for now, I’d let it hurt, because I knew what happened if I didn’t.
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
Elizabeth
I’d eaten my body weight in guacamole but abstained from tequila despite the very real temptation to drown my sorrows in the drink. I didn’t expect to have much of an appetite, but sitting with these women—these friends—had relaxed me enough to enjoy the company and food.
Nikki, Winnie, Catherine, Elise, Dove, and Jo had taken me to dinner, and now only four of us remained. Nikki, Winnie, and Catherine had all begged off to get home, but Elise, Dove, and Jo stayed with me, laughing over nothing and prolonging the night.
“I can’t believe you’re going to go back. Didn’t we charm you enough to lure you here for good?” Dove asked, head resting in her palm.
“And if not us, what about Army Barbie? He’s gorgeous, ridiculously sweet, and completely in love with you. What more do you want?” Elise said, though her words were alittle squishy because she had indulged in a margarita or two.
Dove giggled and Jo hid her smile.
“He’s wonderful. You all are. Silverton is. Being near family is,” I said, making sure Jo could see I really meant it. “But this is my job. It’s been my life for my entire adulthood.”
“Seems to me that’s the problem. Your job is your life. You have friends there? Family? A lover?”
My stomach flipped at the wordlover. True enough, I could’ve had that here.
