Page 124 of Crew
I lifted a shoulder. "I don't know. Maybe I'm too tired?"
"Bullshit." He tilted his head to the side. "What's going on with you?"
"I don't know. Really."
"Bren."
"Really." I laughed. "I don't know. Something's different. Maybe it was me stabbing the principal, or maybe I don't know. I really don't."
But I felt good, better. I was going with that. Things didn't scare me as much. I felt better. Life wasn't as bleak, though it probably should've been if history was the best prediction of the future. I should be scared as hell.
"I didn't go to jail. That's it."
He laughed shortly. "I doubt it. You wouldn't have cared if you went in there."
I should've, but he was right. I wouldn't have four months ago. And that told me how much I did care now. "Yeah. Maybe."
"You haven't gone to watch the house since the incident either."
Ah.
There was the underlying reason he wanted to talk. Not about us, but about me.
Some of the flutters dissipated, and I bit my lip. "We're talking about that stuff now?"
"I envision a lot of kissing for us in the future, so yeah. Let's do this now. I'd ask you anyway. I mean, I might not say it outright, but I'd still ask."
"About kissing?"
His eyes darkened, but his mouth lifted. "You know what I mean. Do you think we should talk about it?"
About us, about me, about everything. He was asking about everything.
I had a different opinion. "Nope. I'm good."
"Bren." He reached for me.
I stepped back, evading him. "I like what we're doing. You're right. I would normally be running for the hills or looking for fights, but I'm not. I don't want to force anything." My voice dropped to a whisper. "I can't lose you."
"Why do you think you'd lose me?"
I didn't want to open old wounds and go back to where I'd been before I stabbed Principal Neeon. "Just... Don't push, okay? Not with that."
"Okay." He nodded. "I won't."
Some of the knots in my chest loosened.
"What the fuck are you two doing?" Jordan yelled from the fast food place.
Cross and I shared a grin, and he moved around me once more. "Talking about my sister. Chill out. We're coming."
Cross fell in step beside me. I felt us falling back into our old roles. We were beginning to be more, but he was my best friend first. That's what I needed at the moment.
"What town are we even in?" I asked as we went inside.
"I don't know," he said. "Jordan, where are we at?"
We headed for their booth.
