Page 19 of Crew
We watched as Jordan caught up to the group. One of the girls went up to him, and he lifted his arm, letting it fall over her shoulders. Her arm wrapped around his waist, and slowly, the entire group headed over to where Jordan's truck was parked, though a few girls still snuck glances back at Cross.
Another group of students walked right past us, interrupting the girls' view. I felt the break from their attention, and Cross turned to me.
He got right to the point. "Is it bad, what he knows?"
There it was. That punch again.
Feeling tears threatening, I scowled. I didn't fucking cry. Ever.
"Seriously?" I was more asking myself. I was mortified to be a girl.
As I started for the door of my Jeep, Cross blocked me. He held his hands up. "I just want to know how bad it is."
He was pushing, right after he'd told me he wouldn't.
I almost growled, shoving him back a step, the gesture so small no one could see because he was that close. "You know it is or I'd tell you."
I tried again to get into my vehicle.
His chin jutted out. "You liked Drake, but you weren't that serious. I know you better than anyone. I'm hoping that guy was bluffing and he doesn't know whatever it is you don't even want me to know, but what if he does? If it's that bad, maybe you should tell me sooner rather than later."
Fuck. That was my worst nightmare. Cross had put it into words.
He stepped close to me. "I racked my brain all morning, but I can't think of something you'd be okay with Drake knowing and not me."
I felt a knife in my lungs. "Cross, stop it." I started to shake my head.
"Bren." It was a soft and quiet command.
That almost broke me, coming from him. Anyone else, hell no. Cross, any day of the week.
"Stop." I put a warning in my voice. "I mean it."
We stood there. We were at an impasse.
His eyes narrowed. "What can it be? There's nothing I could know about you that would hurt..." His frown deepened, and he trailed off. "Unless it hurts someone else?"
I still didn't want to say, but he was making this hard. I squeezed my hands into fists. "Look, I will tell you, but give me time. Please? You're right. If he knows, you guys have to know. But not yet." I wasn't ready. It was plain and simple. It had been one of the worst nights of my life, and it didn't come easily to my lips.
He let out a sigh. "Fine." He moved aside, his hand brushing against mine, and I knew that was his apology for pushing me. That side of Cross didn't come out too often, and rarely toward me. His gesture meant a lot.
I unlocked the Jeep, but stopped as my hand closed around the handle. I looked back. Cross still stood at the end of my vehicle, his head down. He was deep in thought.
My heart tugged. I didn't like feeling like I'd let him down or hurt him. That was the last thing I wanted.
"I'm not proud of it," I called.
His head lifted. I'd just confirmed what he thought. We might not share our innermost feelings, but maybe he was right. Maybe this was something I should've told him and the others long ago. Still, the thought of saying the words, telling them what I'd done--it stuck in my throat.
"I'm going to skip."
"Yeah?" He frowned.
The unrest was too much in me. I was too on edge. "Yeah. Find me after school."
He nodded, our eyes holding for a second. If he didn't find me, I'd find him. It was how we worked.
I got inside my Jeep. I was already off to a stellar year.
