Page 95 of Crew
No. I did make her cry.
It was a weird feeling, not just knowing she cared, but feeling it.
After she kept getting things for me, I finally waved her off.
"Go to work." I had everything I needed around me--my phone, a blanket... I wasn't even sure if I would watch television. "I'm fine. Really."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. I'm sure. Go."
She still wavered, but then grabbed her phone and purse. "Okay. I'm going to go. I'm going to call your brother. He'll check on you this afternoon, and Bren?" She paused in the doorway. "Please stay here tonight. Don't go out. Just for one night."
I stared at her a moment.
I was used to hard, smart-ass Heather Jax, not this one. I got a glimpse of what she'd be like as a mother, and feeling a lump form in my throat, I nodded. "I'll stay." My voice was a bit hoarse, but she didn't seem to notice.
"Okay." I heard the back door open, and she yelled, "And call if you need anything. Please."
Her car started a minute later. I breathed a little easier once she was gone. It was overwhelming when all of her attention was focused on me, but already I missed it.
It was a lot, but it was a good a lot.
And that felt weird too.
I heard someone coming, but I didn't move.
I had become one with the hill, the trees, the grasshoppers chirping. I felt like I was up above, staring down at myself. I was there, right next to my mom, and I could almost hear her laughing in my ear.
"What have you gotten yourself into now, Bren?"
She would've laughed. She would've shaken her head at me, but there would've been a twinge of concern and fear in her eyes. She would've worried she was to blame.
It was nighttime. I'd stayed home all day until the restlessness kicked in. Heather had called a couple times to check on me, and she'd been right. Channing had brought food for a late lunch, but he'd had to return to the bar. Jordan texted and asked if I needed anything. I was tempted to have them skip and hang out with me, but I didn't. I tried to be a good influence, for once.
When I said I was fine, Jordan replied that he and Zellman were going to kick it at his house after school. That was fine with me. It was in the back of my mind to join, but I'd told Heather I'd stay the day, and that's what I did. Cross texted a few times too, but he wasn't a big texter. I hadn't expected a lot. I hadn't heard from him since school let out, so a part of me already knew what the plan for the evening would be.
At eight, Channing texted that he was heading to Manny's. Heather had to stay for closing, so I knew what their hours would be. He'd stay till she closed, which would be late.
I took that as my cue.
I'd headed out, and I knew who was likely to be standing over me soon.
I opened my eyes now as a shadow fell across me, and there he was.
I smiled. "How'd I know you'd come?"
Cross grinned back. "You're my best friend." He sat next to me, drawing his knees up, his arms hanging over them.
"You okay?" His fingers touched my skin where my shirt had ridden up. He wasn't just asking about the Ryerson fight.
I jerked my head in a nod. My voice wasn't working. Things were changing with Cross and me.
He had touched me again, and I liked it.
I was starting to need him to touch me more. What would happen if I didn't stop this?
I tried to think of being with Cross, and then not. Of finding him with someone else. I tried to think how it'd feel if he walked away from me like Drake had. It had hurt with Drake--I couldn't lie about that--but it would be devastating with Cross.
Pure agony sliced through my chest. That couldn't happen. Ever.
"You're never going to leave, are you?" It wasn't like his answer would settle a future problem, but I couldn't help myself.
I waited for him to respond, and my skin began to burn under his hand. I wanted his fingers to move, explore. I wanted them to slip under my shirt, and I tried to think of a way to lift it for him without moving a muscle.
"What?" His eyebrows drew together. "Where'd that come from?"
"Are you?"
