Page 51 of Daring to Love You
He ran his hand over his head and down to the back of his neck as he expelled a long breath. How had things come to a screeching halt so fast? The last thirty or forty minutes with Dorian had been downright amazing, better than anything he could’ve planned for the evening. But then, out of nowhere, she sprung the virgin confession on him.
Talk about throwing a curve ball. He’d been caught off guard by her admission and then sat there like a dufus not knowing what to say.
And if that hadn’t been enough, she’d blown him away with her request.
I want you to be my first.
The words blared through his mind as he dropped down on the bed, then fell back and stared at the white ceiling. He could’ve handled that better, but the woman had a way of throwing him off his game.
He was thrilled she wanted him to be her first, but that was a lot of pressure to put on a guy. His first time with a girl, Marisela,hadn’t meant much to his fifteen-year-old horny body. But it had given him bragging rights with his even hornier buddies.
But Dorian?
She was special, and she deserved for her first time to be just as special. The thought of her saving herself for so many years and then asking him to be her first… It should be an honor. Hell, it was an honor, one he wouldn’t take lightly.
First, he had to wrap his brain around everything. Sure, he’d known she wasn’t as experienced as some of the women he’d been with, but a virgin? Mind. Blown. Now a few things made more sense.
“It’s okay, sweet baby. TT Dorian has you.” Dorian’s soothing voice came through the baby monitor that Lynix had forgotten about. He’d heard Zanaya crying but had been distracted.
“Shhh, it’s okay. We need to be quiet so we don’t wake your brother.” Zanaya quieted as Dorian continued talking softly to her. “Were me and Uncle Lynix too loud? Did we wake you up? Sorry about that, but you need to learn how to sleep as sound as your brother.”
Lynix closed his eyes, picturing Dorian sitting in the rocker holding his goddaughter. She was a natural with them, and he could totally see her with kids of her own.
“I think I messed up with your godfather tonight,” Dorian continued. Lynix’s eyes popped open, and he propped himself up on his elbows.
He should probably turn off the baby monitor since Dorian didn’t realize she had an audience, but he wanted to know what she was thinking. The last thing he wanted was for her to have any regrets when it came to him.
“He’s such a nice guy, and he made me feel things tonight that I’ve never felt with anyone. Ever. And I enjoyed every moment.”
Lynix relaxed, glad he hadn’t totally blown it with her.
“I’ve told myself a hundred times,” she continued, “he’s out of my league, and tonight proved that. What would he want with a virgin when there are so many beautiful, sexy, experienced women out there? Have you seen him? He can have any woman he wants. Yet, he’s doing me a favor by pretending to be my boyfriend.”
If only she knew. She was the one doing him a favor. Yes, he was glad to help get her mother to back off, but in turn, he was getting so much more. He was getting the opportunity to show Dorian a different side of him. Yes, she’d be helping him out by being his plus-one at the gala and showing his father that he had a woman, but it was so much more than that.
“I might’ve messed up our pretend relationship,” she was saying to the baby.
Lynix could almost picture her looking defeated. He’d seen the expression the first time she’d told him what had transpired between her and Rodney. Which reminded him—Lynix dug his cell phone from his pocket—he needed a direct phone number for the owner of Concept Marketing Agency.
Once he shot off a quick text to Wes, he shoved his cell phone back into his pocket and stood. He needed to fix the mess between him and Dorian. He couldn’t have her thinking he’d ever want any other woman but her.
And she thought she was out of her league? That’s crazy. He might have more money and connections than her, but that was it. If anything, it was the other way around. Dorian was too good for him, and for a while, he feared that if they got together he’d corrupt her in some way. Steal her innocence—though at the time, he hadn’t known she was a virgin—but he thought he’d somehow taint her moral purity. Everything about the woman was good and pure and so different from who he was, and he didn’t want her to change. Not because of him.
As for her being a virgin, untouched by another man? Even better. He needed to make it clear that he’d be honored to be her first. He just didn’t want it to happen yet. Not until he knew she was ready to move past this pretend shit that his stupid ass had talked her into.
Lynix left the guest room, and when he made his way to the nursery, he stopped in the doorway. Onyx lifted his head and looked at him, then laid his head back down on his paws.
Dorian hadn’t noticed him yet, giving him a chance to watch her for a moment as she sat in the rocking chair with Zanaya. It was a beautiful sight, and in that moment, he could imagine her rocking their baby.
Lynix wasn’t sure if he’d made a sound, but she glanced up and gave a small smile.
“She’s almost asleep,” she whispered.
He moved quietly into the room and knelt next to the rocker. He could wait and talk to her after Zanaya was back in bed, but he couldn’t have Dorian thinking he didn’t want her. That he didn’t want to be her first.
Her attention went back to the baby whose eyes were drifting closed.
“Listen to me,” Lynix whispered, and Dorian looked at him. “I want you more than I have ever wanted another woman. The fact that you’re a virgin, and you want me to be your first, is an honor. But it also makes me want to know for certain that you’re sure.”
