Page 53 of Starting Over at Halesmere House
‘So it’s the Halesmere wood you’re going to be working in, before you leave?’ Sometimes Alice felt as though all roads were leading to that point now, and her life would change again.
‘Yes.’ Prim had bounded up, tongue lolling, and Zac reached down to pat her before she took off again, racing after the children. ‘There’s a lot of rhododendrons to come out and Max wants to plant more native species. The conifers aren’t native, but they support wildlife with shelter and food, so they aren’t going anywhere.’
‘That’s not what you said about mine.’
Zac laughed, and her arm went across his back, keeping him close too.
‘Would it reflect very badly on my professional skills if I said they weren’t as urgent as all that? I wanted to see you again.’
‘Not in the least; I think you’re an excellent tree surgeon. Had you not insisted on removing them so promptly, I might have been tempted to push one over and call you out anyway.’
‘I won’t get all the work Max wants done before I leave; it’s a long-term project.’ Zac halted, letting his arm drop as he faced her. Lily and Arlo were investigating a burrow with Prim, who was far too large to think about going down it.
‘Does that mean you’ll be coming back?’ she asked lightly. His connections to Halesmere were growing and each was another thread, tying him to this place. Might she be one of them? She didn’t dare presume or hope; it was against everything they’d promised each other about his moving on.
‘I’m sure I will,’ he replied just as casually. ‘But it’s a twelve-hour round trip so I won’t be nipping down every weekend.’
‘I understand.’ If he’d meant that as a warning, then she’d got it. Have fun, enjoy this time, but it wasn’t going to last. Alice took a deep breath; every minute together was starting to count. But next year wasn’t here yet and Zac was. ‘Are we still taking the bikes out later? I could do with the practice.’
‘I’m game if you are.’
‘As long as you promise to go easy and feed me cake afterwards.’
‘I’m promising no such thing.’ He went to grab her, and she darted out of his way. ‘You need those miles now, Harvey, not more cake. But if you’d like to come home with me, I will arrange dinner.’
His eyes were understanding when they caught hers, letting her know he wasn’t making light of her reason for entering. But the triathlon was months away and she would get there; she could feel it. Every day she was stronger – physically and mentally – and every day she was making progress and contentment was returning. She just couldn’t allow too much of it to be bound up in Zac and the time they were spending together.
‘I’d love to. Have you ever done a triathlon, or a road race?’ She’d wondered about an outlet for the competitiveness that had dominated his racing career, when he’d hated other drivers getting in his way, and her question was a distraction from thoughts of going back to the flat with him later. ‘You’re obviously fit enough, and I can imagine you battling to the finish to cross the line in front.’
‘No, my competition days are over.’ Prim was racing towards them with Arlo in hot pursuit and they stepped aside as she crashed past. Lily blew her dog whistle and Prim turned and took off, skidding to a halt to sit in front of her, waiting expectantly for a treat.
‘I don’t want to go there, Alice. I know myself and I’d push too hard. I hate the thought of having another accident, maybe surgery again, hospitals, physio, recovery, all that. I was very, very competitive and it cost me my career. Racing for fun, when there’s nothing on the line but finishing first, isn’t worth it now. I need to be able to work.’
‘But you ride those mountain trails! Surely you’re taking just as much of a risk when you do that. You could crash at any moment.’
‘I know my limits now.’ He shrugged and she took his hand to squeeze it. ‘I can get off any time I like, slow down and take it easy. There’s a reason I ride alone.’
‘So no one can see, if you…’ Alice wasn’t sure if her guess was correct, or that he would want her saying it out loud.
‘Yeah.’ He forced out a laugh as he looked away. ‘Even my dad thinks I ride hard, when I don’t. I just let everyone assume. But I have to keep trying otherwise I’d never get out there and that’s not how I want to live.’
‘I understand.’ Alice put her arms around Zac, holding him tightly. ‘I’m sorry you won’t be here in the summer to see me finish the race.’
‘Who says I won’t?’ He tilted his head to look at her. ‘I’ll be there, dangling cake to get you over the line.’
‘You will?’ That was an unexpected pleasure. ‘I won’t need the cake; just the sight of you will be enough.’ She hesitated. ‘And I’d love you to be there, but please don’t make a promise you might not want to keep, Zac. I know I’m going to be okay, more than that, and it’s ages away. Things might have changed for both of us by then.’
‘I know. But I also know what it means to you.’
He dropped a kiss onto her hair, and they separated as the children reached them, pink-faced and breathless. Lily and Arlo were ready to eat, so they turned around, heading back towards Halesmere to find a perfect spot the children knew well. Alice had never seen this lovely glade before, the tree canopy above them bare without its leaves. She helped them spread out a picnic blanket and Arlo was the first to flop down onto it.
Lily shared the crusts from her sandwiches with Prim, who was hoovering them up gratefully as she leaned against Lily, head on one of Lily’s legs. Alice had made hot chocolate and she shared four cups between them, so welcome on such a brisk winter’s day. The children didn’t sit still for long, and Zac suggested a game, splitting into pairs of one older and one younger. Lily immediately wanted girls versus boys and Alice was happy to oblige.
One person would be blindfolded, and their partner would lead them to a tree to explore it using touch and smell. Then the blindfolded person would be returned to their starting point via a different route, the blindfold removed so they could try to recognise their tree from their sensory exploration. Alice gave up her hat to Lily and Zac did the same with the spare he’d brought, pulling it low over Arlo’s eyes. They chose a tree and led the children out of their glade. Lily was convinced she had a silver birch from the single narrow trunk and thin stems, while Zac had guided Arlo to a beech, its trunk rippled and ancient.
After touching, sniffing and trying to describe everything they’d discovered, Lily and Arlo were led back to their starting point and Alice and Zac removed the blindfolds. Both children managed to find their trees again, which delighted them no end. The adults needed a turn too, and Alice and Zac obliged, pulling the hats over their own eyes, and laughing as they tried not to stumble over uneven ground.
It didn’t take Zac long to identify the holly Arlo had him touch when he caught a finger on a spiky leaf and he threatened to dunk his young partner in the stream as a punishment. Alice found her tree trickier, and it was Zac who identified it as ash when her blindfold was removed, its lateral black buds in opposite pairs making it easy for him. The children begged Zac to bring them again for more games another day, and he promised to show them how to light a fire and bake apples.
