Page 70 of Love in the Stacks
Nervously, I follow him down the hall. When we enter his office, I see Adam already sitting at the small table there.
“If this is about Thursday…” I trail off when Adam subtly shakes his head at me, a glint of panic in his eyes.
“What happened Thursday?” Herb asks.
“Never mind,” I answer and take the chair across from Adam as Herb sits between us.
“What’s going on, Herb?” Adam asks.
“I just heard from one of our friends on the board of trustees,” he says. “It seems that high-ranking members of the Harkness leadership, namely Dr. Clifton and his cronies, have been making a fuss about the graphic novel collection.” Dr. Clifton is the college provost.
I’m immediately on alert. I sit up straighter. “What kind of fuss?”
Herb clears his throat. “The kind where Dr. Clifton doesn’t think the content of the graphic novels is appropriate for the library.”
“What content?” I demand.
“To be honest, Nicole, I don’t think that Dr. Clifton has any idea what graphic novels we even have in our collection, let alone their content. I think he has a problem with us having graphic novels at all.”
“But that’s not fair!” I object. “The graphic novels we bought are wholly appropriate for the degree programs at Harkness. Faculty members are already using them in their classes to teach students.”
Herb holds up his hand, as if to ward off my protests. “Right now, they just want more information. A list of the titles, their synopses, that kind of thing.”
Adam glances at me quickly, then says, “I have a spreadsheet of all the titles that lists how much they cost, which academic department they match up with, and their Library of Congress subject headings.”
“That’s perfect,” says Herb.
“Herb,” I warn, “if they start digging into these titles, they are going to find themes they don’t like. But they’re the same themes that students in English classes read in their assigned works of literature, and that students in art history study in great paintings, and students in history classes learn about throughout all human history. It’s nothing they won’t find in the rest of our library’s collection.”
Herb sighs. “I know,” he says. “Right now, they’re only asking for more information. We’ll see what happens next.”
My brain starts whirling with the possibilities of all the things that might “happen next.” I’m not afraid of a little controversy, and I am prepared to stand up for this project. I believe in it. But Adam. He was dragged into the project. He didn’t choose this. I don’t want to put him in the position of fighting this battle, too. He may not even want to.
“Herb,” I say resolutely, “the graphic novel collection is my project. I introduced it. I pushed for it. So, I’m the one who should beheld accountable for it to the leadership. I understand that because you approved it as the director of the library, you’re implicated here as well, but Adam doesn’t need to be involved—”
“No,” Adam interjects, but I talk over him.
“The graphic novel collection is not his responsibility. Can we leave him out of it?” I finish.
I hazard a quick glance at Adam, and his jaw is tight.
“I don’t want to be left out,” Adam bites out. “This is my project, too. And I stand behind the work I did on it.”
Herb’s eyes bob between me and Adam as he considers our words. “I agree with Adam,” he finally says. “You will both do any work the leadership needs done for them to feel comfortable with the graphic novel collection being part of our library.” He shifts to look at me directly. “It’s a good project, and it was done well. Neither of you should doubt that.”
As we step into the hallway, I start, “Adam—”
He cuts me off quickly. “Let’s talk in your office.”
I nod, and we walk down the hall.
When we’re settled with the door closed, I jump in before Adam can say anything. “I know you’re upset,” I begin, “but I was just thinking of you. You’re Mr. Rules, and this could lead to a confrontation with the leadership of the college, literally a nightmare scenario for you. You don’t want to do that.”
When he speaks, Adam’s voice is controlled, his words clipped. “I do like the structure of rules, but we didn’t break any in doing this project. I worked hard to make sure the title choices were academically vetted and supported. I have confidence in my work, andI am a man who takes responsibility for my actions, even when it’s uncomfortable.”
A rock lodges in the pit of my stomach. Words and intentions and feelings have gotten mixed up somehow and they’re all swirling into a tornado. And I think it’s my fault. I look at Adam again, and it’s no longer anger I see in his eyes, but hurt.
“I would have thought,” Adam continues, his voice shifting now, cracking, “that you would know me well enough by now to know that I would never let someone else take the fall for me. Especially you. Is that really what you think of me? That I’m, what, too weak, to stand up for what’s right?”
